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Question about kids
#9138907
Yesterday at 06:29 PM
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Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 23,252
BigPig
OP
THF Celebrity
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OP
THF Celebrity
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 23,252 |
Raising kids is a never ending surprise. You never know what they are going to say or ask. I try to shield my kid from my job as much as possible, he never saw me in uniform until he was 4, and here more recently, unfortunately, he’s seen dark side of what being a police officer is. He’s seen me happy and seen me cry, he’s seen me prepare for a funeral and then a promotion. For the first time in his life, I’m not home to put him to bed, and we both hate it.
Lately though, he’s been asking about death, A LOT. He asks about my dad that passed away 6 years ago, they never had the opportunity to meet since Lane was born a year later, but they share the same interest. The questions he asks are concerning, at least to first time parents, and some of the things he says are concerning. He’s a very happy kid, but sometimes he says things that shock you to the core.
Is this just kids being curious? Should I find a therapist to take him too?
Wade Dews, REALTOR ® Rendon Realty, LLC Frontline Real Estate Team www.RendonRealty.comWadeDews@gmail.com 214-356-2410 Up to 1% for closing costs for First Responders & Veterans Proudly partnered with Assist The Officer Foundation https://atodallas.org/
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9138919
Yesterday at 06:42 PM
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Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 1,717
SherpaPhil
Pro Tracker
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Pro Tracker
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 1,717 |
FWIW, my 5 year old is currently regularly threatening to cut people's heads off with an ax. He is not my first, and I am not concerned. No clue at all if I am doing this parenting thing right, but thought I'd share. Kids are weird.
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9138922
Yesterday at 06:48 PM
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Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 7,004
onlysmith&wesson
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Jul 2014
Posts: 7,004 |
I raised 3. They are naturally curious about death because to them it is a concept that they just can't get their hands around. They only know life and the living. On their peripheral is this vague thing known as death. They haven't experienced it indirectly due to their stage in life. He may be ready to learn about the physical side of death from a trip to the cemetery where you can explain everything to him at your father's graveside. You can give a look up and explain to him that his soul lives in Heaven. That's a happy thought for him to dwell on. There are still parts of life/death and Heaven/Hell that adults don't understand, so he's at a natural progression of trying to grasp a difficult concept.
Therapist? Not unless there are behaviors that are alarming. Asking questions, to me that's not alarming.
An unethical shot is one you take, that you know you shouldn't.
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9138924
Yesterday at 06:50 PM
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Joined: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,503
Lakhota
Extreme Tracker
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Extreme Tracker
Joined: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,503 |
Wade, without knowing the questions he is asking it’s hard to know if a therapist is needed or not.
I would would bet more than likely he is just curious and wants to know how things work. I would answer his questions as best you can and think is appropriate. I would also ask him why he wants to know. I think the best thing a parent can do is let their child know they can come to them with any questions they have and you will answer best you can.
Death is a part of life and many parents try to shield their children from this part of life I completely understand with your line of work that this is a REAL reality and how you might want to shield him from this. Just let him know that you will always be there for him and he can ask you anything.
Good luck and I think you are doing a good job.
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9138928
Yesterday at 07:09 PM
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Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 18,878
ducknbass
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 18,878 |
My daughter was curious as well. She was barely 3 when she lost here Nana (my mother) and she couldn’t understand and it jerked a tear from me that she couldn’t.
I don’t think it’s anything to be alarmed about personally.
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: onlysmith&wesson]
#9138932
Yesterday at 07:17 PM
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Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 23,252
BigPig
OP
THF Celebrity
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OP
THF Celebrity
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 23,252 |
I raised 3. They are naturally curious about death because to them it is a concept that they just can't get their hands around. They only know life and the living. On their peripheral is this vague thing known as death. They haven't experienced it indirectly due to their stage in life. He may be ready to learn about the physical side of death from a trip to the cemetery where you can explain everything to him at your father's graveside. You can give a look up and explain to him that his soul lives in Heaven. That's a happy thought for him to dwell on. There are still parts of life/death and Heaven/Hell that adults don't understand, so he's at a natural progression of trying to grasp a difficult concept.
Therapist? Not unless there are behaviors that are alarming. Asking questions, to me that's not alarming. My dad’s urn is on a shelf in our living room, he knows about it. He knows that he is up in heaven watching him. We’ve had these discussions about the time we had to put our dogs down 3 years ago. What’s concerning, is when he ask when he can die, or when he says he wants to die to go meet my dad and see his dogs again. We had a miscarriage 2 years ago, he asks about going to see his sister.
Wade Dews, REALTOR ® Rendon Realty, LLC Frontline Real Estate Team www.RendonRealty.comWadeDews@gmail.com 214-356-2410 Up to 1% for closing costs for First Responders & Veterans Proudly partnered with Assist The Officer Foundation https://atodallas.org/
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9138935
Yesterday at 07:21 PM
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 8,735
Dave Davidson
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 8,735 |
Wade, tell that boy his sister wants him to grow up, have kids, and name one after her.
I had to do that. There is no greater curse than outliving your children.
Without a sense of urgency, nothing ever happens.
Boy, if I say "sic em", you'd better look for something to bite. Sam Shelley, Rancher Muleshoe Texas 1892-1985 RIP
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9138936
Yesterday at 07:23 PM
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Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 583
HunterMattW2
Tracker
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Tracker
Joined: Mar 2012
Posts: 583 |
Start at 2:48:00 and listen through 2:53:00....this will give you just enough background on him and what he went through. Having little ones myself, this rang with me hard and will add it to our techniques with our children as the situations present themselves. Kids are smart, but need it straight.
It's hard to feel sorry for someone with one leg who shoots themself in the foot.
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9138939
Yesterday at 07:29 PM
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Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 11,121
DQ Kid
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 11,121 |
The young man could be starting to make connections to the animals you are hunting being killed/dead and implications of death in humanity. Hunting allows a natural bridge to explain how that works in humans, minus eating the deceased, as that would be just plain gross, lol. Seriously, just juvenile curiosity at work.
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: SherpaPhil]
#9138960
Yesterday at 08:10 PM
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Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 26,816
Creekrunner
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 26,816 |
FWIW, my 5 year old is currently regularly threatening to cut people's heads off with an ax. We've got a nephew that threatened that to my mother-in-law over 30 years ago at a fancy restaurant dinner. You'd have to get to know my mother-in-law to understand my point of view of this event.
...and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. Gen. 1:28
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9138972
Yesterday at 08:35 PM
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Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 16,608
603Country
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 16,608 |
Yessir, that thing about the ax is a bit more concerning than a kid asking about death. Better put the axes and hatchets away for a while.
Not my monkeys, not my circus...
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9139159
6 hours ago
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 12,992
deerfeeder
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 12,992 |
Some of the stuff they come up with is based on something they saw on television or in a movie. Talking with them when they need/want to talk about serious stuff, in terms they can understand, usually will satisfy them...for awhile at least.
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9139160
6 hours ago
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 40,226
redchevy
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 40,226 |
Would t bother me. He doesn’t understand all the way yet and the permanency of death. Just answer the questions you can as good as you can tell him you love him and he’s got a lot of life to live. Kids are all different. Some raised te same way same rules expectations etc. are completely different. I have a 10 year old and a 6 year old and in many respects they could not be more different.
It's hell eatin em live
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9139163
6 hours ago
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Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 9,314
freerange
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Apr 2013
Posts: 9,314 |
How old is he? Sorry if I missed that.
At some point in life its time to quit chasing the pot of gold and just enjoy the rainbow. FR Keep your gratitude higher than your expectations. RWH
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9139165
6 hours ago
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Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 23,574
Bee'z
The Beedazzler
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The Beedazzler
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 23,574 |
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Re: Question about kids
[Re: BigPig]
#9139175
5 hours ago
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 29,237
TXHOGSLAYER
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 29,237 |
Wade is it possible he is asking about death since you took him hunting?
LETS GO BRANDON
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