I walked into the break room at work last week and overheard this conversation, been on my mind ever since. 7 people sitting there, 2 gals and 5 guys. One of the guys, very young maybe 22 or so said he just proposed to his girlfriend and wanted marriage advice. The other 6 folk ranged in age from mid twenties to mid 40’s . All married except one guy who was divorced. Every single person was telling this kid not to do it. Get out now while you can basically. One even said marriage is a linear downfall that starts at day one.

Is this where we are today ? Best marriage advice we can give a young guy is not to do it ? I listened for a couple minutes while I was getting a drink and these folks weren’t just joking they were seriously telling him not to get married .

Would you do it all over again?

I never felt that way in my entire life. I played the field until I was thirty years old.

Hear things like that and feel for those folks.

Times have change for sure. People are way more selfish these days compared to the past which leads to trouble. I know I am and and I let my first wife know but she wanted to get married anyway. Didn't work. I told my second wife I was selfish and she thought she could change that by being selfish too. Well, we're still together but there are some rough times and if it ever goes south I will not do it again. I recommend people do a little soul searching and be honest with themselves before making a commitment like marriage,

Finding the right spouse is 90% luck.

Got married because she got pregnant in 81 IF that had never happen I'd still be single today.

I’d tell the young man that God invented and designed marriage, therefore marriage without god will likely fail.

Sad really

I don't know how I got so lucky. Sometimes I feel both me and my wife even get paranoid at times wondering why it seems everything is soo good when we see so many others struggling.

I believe it boils down to BOTH of us being raised by good parents and both of us willing to put the other ahead of ourselves. We had some drag outs the first few years but it's been a long time since we had a big fight. Yes, we have small arguments all the time but nothing major.

I've seen a lot of my coworker's marriages go down the tubes. I don't really have an answer for them. I advise them to do all they can to make it work but at some point it's not salvageable and at that point I tell them to protect themselves.

I've seen many guys get completely raked over the coals because they tried to be the nice guy.

I would do every minute of it again and wouldn't take a trillion dollars for the 36 years I had with my wife. I truly feel sorry for anyone who is married but tells others not to do it. That has to be a terrible existence.

I did do it all over again...3 times to be exact! I believe in the institution of marriage. I believe that God intended Man and Woman to join in marriage. It just took me 3 times to finally get it right. But, is that where we are today? For a lot of people, yes. That is exactly where we are today. It is sad.

I love my wife. She makes me a better person.

I am so imperfect that I cannot see why she puts up with me.

Does she drive me crazy sometimes? YES!

I look at it as 80-10-10. 80 percent great, 10 percent ok, 10 percent not so ok.

Find the right one and it works.

If a young man at 22 asked me this question today ... I would probably give the same advice. I married at 21 and I was not financially or emotionally ready for it. In short, marriage is for grownups. I was not.

Once again, proof of the "Me" generation.
They look at marriage as what they have to give up, instead of what they gain and can give.
Basic selfishness abounds and no end in sight.

22 is too young, but I am very glad I did it. Best decision I ever made. I heard someone say one time, that most marital problems occur because women think men will change, and men think women won't.

It seems I’m seeing a lot more people just living together, having kids and not getting married. Seems that older widows and divorced folks are more into that also...many of them don’t marry because of financial reasons.

Marriage cost way more than it used to. Everything from kids to washing machines. With social media what it is with young people, everybody knows all the good and all the bad.

In my day, finding the right person was not a bad idea, this day and time I’m not so sure. If something happened to my wife tomorrow I’d just hunt and fish as long as I could. I would not go looking.

My advise to young people, get a dog and take really good care of it.

Perfect marriage for me except for no grand children.

I would tell him the same thing. 22 is too young.
I’m on my second and It sucks d. I should have stayed with the first one for my kids at least. 14 years first time, almost 2 now. Grass isn’t always greener.

Dang.........

I would have told him 22 is young and there is a lot of maturity that comes with even a few more years of growing. I was pretty selfish at that age and glad I waited til I was approaching 30 to finally get married - almost 30 years! I wouldn't change any of it...

I have recommended both sides to get married and not to. I have a few buddies and family members I told they better not let their significant other get away put a ring on it. Only one, but the one I told I didnt think it was a good idea is now divorced. His second is a keeper.

Im happily married. I do miss the freedom and time management of my pre married days, but would absolutely not even consider trading them for my family.

Man now that is good.

Scratch the too young part though, I would have married my wife straight out of high school if I had met her then.

Marriage is hard work at times. Too many people jump in too soon these days. I knew my wife for several years and our relationship was on again, off again during that time. One reason was because we were too young.
Nobody is truly grown until about year 25.
Each case is different and it depends on the people, but if I were doing it again, I wouldn't marry until at least 25.

Oh, and go to church every single week. It'll humble you and teach you how to truly care.

41 years for us.

I think 22 is too young. Wife and I started dating at 22 - married at 25.

The good times far outweigh the bad times...but man years 6-7 of marriage about destroyed both of us...but we worked the problems - forgave, overcame, and honestly our relationship is better than it has ever been.

The truth to the matter is people have been conditioned that relationships are like you see on TV....an easy fairy tale...the reality is - life is messy and sometimes its not pretty - it takes a ton of commitment, selflessness, and work to truly have a "great" marriage. It is 110% a two-way street.

Anyone who says marriage is easy is either lying to themselves, never been married, or one of those 0.0001% of people who found the unicorn - and their spouse found the unicorn.