Not if you drive fast enough

Use about a 1/4 ratio of picante sauce to the pizza sauce.

I have to try that.

I flew 46 out of 52 weeks this year. Got the full pat down one time. But, I get the hand/phone swab treatment about once a month. It’s a random selection.

I have flown a ton this past year and half. They never do anything to me. nothing. Its weird. And many times I have a one way ticket. In fact it was 2000 the last time they checked me and that was just to electronically sniff a backpack headed to florida out of love field.

I never get checked. My wife gets pat downs about 50% of the time. Always a female agent and only at DFW. There would be problems if it wasn't.

I got my laptop case/briefcase searched at Las Vegas recently. The wife put a bag of candy in there and forgot to tell me. Luckily it was not that "special" kind of candy you can buy in Nevada. Which I'm sure that is what they were looking for.

Only place I've ever had a problem was in Dubai. I traveled with a group of people who didn't want to have to use an international cell plan to talk car to car since there were a bunch of us and several vehicles. Of course the two way radios got put in my backpack. (No batteries, just radios). Dubai security was less than impressed and I was promptly taken by two AK wielding dudes to a secure area and interrogated for nearly an hour by a woman wearing a full burka. That was fun for a 24 year old that had never been anywhere other than Mexico. I guess since we were traveling from Dubai to Djibouti it raised suspicion with them. They were not nice and didn't take well to smart [censored] jokes. Funny thing was - we had just come through Heathrow and the security was much tighter and they did not care about the radios.

I have RA in my left knee. If I go through a thermal scanner, I always got pulled aside and TSA would check that left knee. The RA makes that knee joint appear hotter than the rest of my body.

My worst fear

You were stopped for statistical purposes. No more no less.

I got stopped by a state trooper up in the panhandle. He said I was speeding, I told him I didn't think so. He said well it could be the tires on my truck throwing my speedometer off so he was just giving me a warning. Then he asked if I would be willing to sign a statement saying that I was a Caucasian male.
I smiled and asked if he had been accused of profiling and he said the whole department had been. I signed the statement and went on my way.

.I have ortho steel in one leg and hip plus pacemaker/defib/LE lead implants in chest. Can be a real pain at airports. I carry letter and med info from my docs.... sometimes that helps, sometimes not

Airports have different equipment. Gainesville Fl has these machines that wrap around you. Make one move before it finishes and you get groped. Problem is you can't hear the agent giving instructions when in one. Glad I don't fly weekly like I did in 80s and 90s.