> A new priest at his first mass was so nervous
> he could hardly speak.
>
>
>
> After mass he asked the monsignor how he had
> done.
>
>
>
> The monsignor replied, " When I am
> worried about getting nervous On the pulpit, I put a glass
> of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous,
> I take a sip."
>
>
>
> So next Sunday he took the monsignor's
> advice.
>
> At the beginning of the sermon, he got
> nervous and took a drink.
>
>
>
> He proceeded to talk up a storm.
>
>
>
> Upon his return to his office after the mass,
> he found the following note on the door:
>
> 1) Sip the vodka, don't gulp.
>
> 2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.
>
> 3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.
>
> 4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
>
> 5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet
> his [censored].
>
> 6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the
> late J.C.
>
> 7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not
> referred to as Daddy, Junior and the spook.
>
> 8) David slew Goliath, he did not kick the
> sh*t out of him.
>
> 9) When David was hit by a rock and was
> knocked off his donkey, don't say he was stoned off his
> [censored].
>
> 10)We do not refer to the cross as the
> "Big T."
>
> 11)When Jesus broke the bread at the last
> supper he said, "take this and eat it for it is my
> body." He did not say " Eat me" .
>
> 12)The Virgin Mary is not called " Mary
> with the Cherry,.
>
> 13)The recommended grace before a meal is
> not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, Yeah God.
>
> 14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling
> contest at ST.Peter's not a peter pulling contest at St.
> Taffy's.

rofl thats good!

WOW thats funny, and bad!

lol, thats funny, yet wrong on so many levels.

ROTF Funny.

You had better watch for lightning for a whole week.