I’ve thought about this before but The funeral cost thread got me wondering, what do you do when you have in-laws or parents you know you will get stuck with the bill? Do you try and talk to them in advance about planning ahead ? I have an in-law that’s as financially responsible as a 14 year old and out of her children I know we are the only ones that will be able to foot the bill.

Not your monkey........not your circus. That's not your responsibility.

My in-laws arranged their on funeral and left a little cash.

Might be a cold statement, but unless somehow you are legally responsible, you don’t have to pay for all or part of the funeral. In your situation I’d bring up the subject with all, including the MiL, and tell them your intentions - not pay or pay a percentage, or match their contributions. Don’t leave it to guesswork by the other parties, where they just assume you are paying.

Exact same here. Very thoughtful

Are they expecting a fancy coffin, vault, etc? If I'm paying you're getting cremated.

I know I’m cold hearted but I’d cremate and that’s about it. I’m not paying for a casket and funeral and all that bs.

This is what we need to do, need to find a good time to bring it up.

My in-laws have already pre-paid all of the funeral/burial costs.

And though the subject has never come up, I've always assumed my folks will be buried at the national cemetery in Houston.

X2
The funeral industry prays on emotions, "You know grandma would have wanted the best".
When my mother passed away the funeral home sat us in a big room and started a slid show, showing options and pricing. They started with caskets starting at 15K, my dad would ask " What else do you have".
They wanted $1500.00 for the spray of flowers to be placed on the casket. Again my dad asked "What eles do you have".
We took care of my mother and didn't break the bank.
Be careful out there.

My uncle died and left me as his sole beneficiary, he was broke. He had already made plans with a funeral home for his funeral but didn't put anything down and didn't have ANY assets. His daughters started calling me asking about payment of the funeral and what not. Then the funeral home started calling me. I politely explained to them that I had zero involvement with the planning, had zero financial gain from his death and would produce zero money to pay for any if it. Never heard back from any of them.

It was kind of funny/sad really. He lived in Lyons and I would see him a couple times a year when I was out that way for training. I was at TEEX in College Station and got a call from my cousin that he had died. Then, I got a call from an attorney's office in Somerville that I was the sole beneficiary of his "estate". I knew my uncle had never held a job and was a con man that made a career of slip and fall lawsuits and selling fake antiques. I get to the attorney's office and meet with him and he explains that I am the only one in his will and he excluded his daughters and ex on purpose and also that there were no assets associated with my uncle's "estate". He was just as confused as I was as to why he wrote up a will when he didn't bequeath anything to anyone.

I think the cost of funerals and caskets are ridiculous anyways. Personally, I dont care what happens to my body after I die. If Im buried, Id rather have the cheapest pine box they can get and would rather forgo all the chemicals and such, just stick me in a hole. I simply dont care. If Im going to have to pay for a funeral for someone, they will get the same treatment, not because I didnt care about them, but because burying their meat body in a $10K metal box just seems stupid to me.

If you think you will end up with the bill, enroll her/him in the Neptune Society, you can make payments now and when she/he kicks they take care of everything all you have to do is make a phone call.

I have made plans to donate anything that might help anyone else, organs and such, whatever is left burn it up. My son will spread my ashes at the two places I love most. It’s all taken care of. I even have a couple gold crowns he has been told to get and do what he wants with it. If he doesn’t want it, donate it to a good cause.

Really doesn’t matter at that point.

Planting human remains in a box with a chunk of stone on top is a terrible waste of land. Cremation is cheap. Paid for mine several years ago....like $595.

SpitfFire’s sister and her husband want me to build simple wooden caskets for the two of them and they are to be buried on their ranch.

SpitFire and I will be cremated.

Funerals are a racket and incredibly stupid waste of money, second only to weddings...

Agreed - ashes to ashes and dust to dust. She pre-paid for her cremation. My brothers and sister paid for a Memorial service at church in honor of her.

Just make sure you do not claim the body...let the county take care of them. If a funeral home contacts you, just keep repeating you are not financially responsible. If the hospital they died in contacts you, just tell them you are not the right party to make the decisions.

Hit them up now

You want them, to plan ahead ????
Just tell them, your going to donate their bodies, to a medical
school so students can practice................. It don't cost a thing...............
Trust me..... They'll make their own arragements...........

Not my in-laws, but was in a similar situation with my Grandpa when he passed and my Grandmother was still living....my brother and I were asked to pay for the funeral while his kids (my mom and her sisters) paid nothing. Meanwhile after he passed I only wanted one thing...an old Nylon 66 .22 LR that I used dozens of times hunting with him as a kid growing up. One of the daughters got the rifle (she has never hunted in her life nor her kid) and then they sold his 4 wheeler, truck, and camper and kept the money. Needless to say it left a bad taste in my mouth and even though I am glad I took care of him I am still unhappy with how it all played out.

Moral of the story....stand firm because the sour taste afterwards can last a long time.

some of youse guys put up with some screwed up crap

Give your guns to who you want before you die 'cause, a lot of times, the family screwed-up will grab them otherwise after.

I would discuss my concerns with my spouse, since it is their parent, and have them speak with them.

The funeral or memorial is not about the dead, but the living's friends and family, so your should be direct on what level of funeral you are willing to pay if your MIL doesn't come through with her own arrangments.

Tell them if they don't make and pay for their own arrangements that you're donating their bodies to science so medical students can practice cutting on their naked bodies.