Posted By: shadams
Best hunting story ever..... - 11/29/16 12:16 AM
So a couple years back we had 2 deer on my game cameras at my feeder we dubbed "Great white" and "Orca"...GW was a huge 9 point deer. Big bodied and rack, Orca was even bigger bodied but much wider. Had them for 2 months before hunting season in 14 and never saw them during the season or since.
Driving out to my place Fri night my cousin calls and says dude.....guess what....GREAT WHITE IS BACK!! Now my cousin is the coolest guy you'll ever meet. Big dude with an even bigger heart. But he is one of those guys that has a story for everything and always see's the biggest deer ever here and there so I always rib him a bit about it anytime another BIG DEER story comes up. He has little things he swears by, for example he always brings empty water bottles to piss in because you cant piss anywhere you are hunting because they will smell it, he even brings them back to camp rather than pouring them out on the property. Anyway he tells me he watched GW at my feeder for 30minutes and hes even bigger than ever. Gets me goin of course so I am pumped to see this deer and put him on the ground. He then tells me he saw orca too and shot at him 4 times and the deer just stood there, then took off.Again, an eyeroll haha. Later went to the range and his gun was way high "Ive NEVER had to site my gun man!" He says he isnt going to make it up that night so good luck and I could tell he was secretly hoping I wouldnt see him.
Im sitting in my blind when I get a text that hes coming up afterall, and I'm kinda bummed because his spot isnt too far from my and in the perimeter and my chances just got cut in half. GW was a no show, so of course I'm really doubting his story now, and just as it gets dark i hear BOOOOMMMM and think awww [censored]....so we wait a bit and grab the polaris and head up to his spot to see what he got. When we pull up he is parked by the feeder and his boy is walking around, and my cousin has his head down in his arms and when he sees us, he starts pacing and kicking the dirt...."what happend???" "It was him.....great white" he says.....so I say"Well, wtf, where is he" "I GUESS I FN MISSED HIM MAN DAMMN" and continues to boo hoo all over the place telling me how there is no blood and they have been walking around for 30 minutes and nothing. He was so bummed I was starting to feel bad. We get back to the house and my other cousin comes back from his spot so I get to hear the story again about how he missed the biggest deer ever and how he isnt meant to get a big buck ever because something always goes wrong. He moans and groans on for another 10 minutes and finally gets in the truck to head home. My bro in law and I watch as they drive off and all of a sudden the brakes violently apply and the door comes flying open and he just flat out raged a barf into the ground. I mean like screaming at the top of his lungs and barfing at the same time. I yell out "DAMN MAN, YOU OK???" and he throws a couple of air punches my way, slams the hell out of his door to his new chevy and floors it out over the cattle guard. We look at each other and kinda laugh, damn he musta worked himself up. I call his boy later to ask what happend......remember when I told you he keeps his piss bottles.......oh yea......he drank his own piss.....after all that, in a huff, he grabbed piss bottle and starts chugging. He realizes two gulps in its piss and just sprays piss out the nose and everything. All over the headliner, all over the windshield, and instinct kicks in and he goes to throw the bottle out the window.....buts it is CLOSED. It hits the window and basically ricochets piss back out of the bottle and directly in his face which triggers an instant vomit fest of epic propotions. Now there is piss and piss flavored throw up everywhere.....everywhere.....all this happend in a nano second and his boy tells me he literally was close to dying from laughing so hard. He said man...I have never seen my dad so mad in his life.
He said the drive home was horrible....he says his dad said he was never hunting again...just cant do it, its too much work, its too stressful and all for what??!! and mout full of piss??!! rawwwrrrrrr........hahahahahahaahaahaahaahahahahaahaaha....
So it does get better. He sleeps in but his boy comes out to "check for the deer" but of course we all knew he just missed it, and we get done with the hunt and his boy comes flying in to camp with a nice 10 pointer (not great white) and is grinning ear to ear. He calls his dad and tells him "man I looked everywhere high and low, and just as I was done, i scanned one last time and not 30 feet from the feeder there he was, under a tree in some tall grass. I can hear his dad screaming for joy on the other end of the line.
So in the end it all worked out, he got his big deer, and we have an awesome story. We named the deer "big gulp" and are going to put that on the plaque and put him up and the ranch.....good times....oh and BTW, nice dder no doubt, but not Great white. Upon seeing the deer himself he said "ok i am going to make a proclamation, I musta had my "deer googles" on. This deer isnt great white.....
Driving out to my place Fri night my cousin calls and says dude.....guess what....GREAT WHITE IS BACK!! Now my cousin is the coolest guy you'll ever meet. Big dude with an even bigger heart. But he is one of those guys that has a story for everything and always see's the biggest deer ever here and there so I always rib him a bit about it anytime another BIG DEER story comes up. He has little things he swears by, for example he always brings empty water bottles to piss in because you cant piss anywhere you are hunting because they will smell it, he even brings them back to camp rather than pouring them out on the property. Anyway he tells me he watched GW at my feeder for 30minutes and hes even bigger than ever. Gets me goin of course so I am pumped to see this deer and put him on the ground. He then tells me he saw orca too and shot at him 4 times and the deer just stood there, then took off.Again, an eyeroll haha. Later went to the range and his gun was way high "Ive NEVER had to site my gun man!" He says he isnt going to make it up that night so good luck and I could tell he was secretly hoping I wouldnt see him.
Im sitting in my blind when I get a text that hes coming up afterall, and I'm kinda bummed because his spot isnt too far from my and in the perimeter and my chances just got cut in half. GW was a no show, so of course I'm really doubting his story now, and just as it gets dark i hear BOOOOMMMM and think awww [censored]....so we wait a bit and grab the polaris and head up to his spot to see what he got. When we pull up he is parked by the feeder and his boy is walking around, and my cousin has his head down in his arms and when he sees us, he starts pacing and kicking the dirt...."what happend???" "It was him.....great white" he says.....so I say"Well, wtf, where is he" "I GUESS I FN MISSED HIM MAN DAMMN" and continues to boo hoo all over the place telling me how there is no blood and they have been walking around for 30 minutes and nothing. He was so bummed I was starting to feel bad. We get back to the house and my other cousin comes back from his spot so I get to hear the story again about how he missed the biggest deer ever and how he isnt meant to get a big buck ever because something always goes wrong. He moans and groans on for another 10 minutes and finally gets in the truck to head home. My bro in law and I watch as they drive off and all of a sudden the brakes violently apply and the door comes flying open and he just flat out raged a barf into the ground. I mean like screaming at the top of his lungs and barfing at the same time. I yell out "DAMN MAN, YOU OK???" and he throws a couple of air punches my way, slams the hell out of his door to his new chevy and floors it out over the cattle guard. We look at each other and kinda laugh, damn he musta worked himself up. I call his boy later to ask what happend......remember when I told you he keeps his piss bottles.......oh yea......he drank his own piss.....after all that, in a huff, he grabbed piss bottle and starts chugging. He realizes two gulps in its piss and just sprays piss out the nose and everything. All over the headliner, all over the windshield, and instinct kicks in and he goes to throw the bottle out the window.....buts it is CLOSED. It hits the window and basically ricochets piss back out of the bottle and directly in his face which triggers an instant vomit fest of epic propotions. Now there is piss and piss flavored throw up everywhere.....everywhere.....all this happend in a nano second and his boy tells me he literally was close to dying from laughing so hard. He said man...I have never seen my dad so mad in his life.
He said the drive home was horrible....he says his dad said he was never hunting again...just cant do it, its too much work, its too stressful and all for what??!! and mout full of piss??!! rawwwrrrrrr........hahahahahahaahaahaahaahahahahaahaaha....
So it does get better. He sleeps in but his boy comes out to "check for the deer" but of course we all knew he just missed it, and we get done with the hunt and his boy comes flying in to camp with a nice 10 pointer (not great white) and is grinning ear to ear. He calls his dad and tells him "man I looked everywhere high and low, and just as I was done, i scanned one last time and not 30 feet from the feeder there he was, under a tree in some tall grass. I can hear his dad screaming for joy on the other end of the line.
So in the end it all worked out, he got his big deer, and we have an awesome story. We named the deer "big gulp" and are going to put that on the plaque and put him up and the ranch.....good times....oh and BTW, nice dder no doubt, but not Great white. Upon seeing the deer himself he said "ok i am going to make a proclamation, I musta had my "deer googles" on. This deer isnt great white.....