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Hosting elderly hunters. #8456598 11/23/21 12:22 AM
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So, I think I'm ready for my father-in-law to come out this Friday. Test-ran the Mr. Buddy heater. I'll grab the Cabela's wool blanket off my grandson's bed. I have a low "The Blynd" I think he can step into. Road feeder is mounted and has corn in it (if he let's me corn close to the blind, he may do his usual "Why?" realmad )

He's 84, on oxygen, and can't walk 20' without having to stop and catch his breath. (Smoker for 50+ years.) He's told every doctor (and there are many) that all he wants to do is hunt one more time. We said "This'll be his last Christmas" for the last 6 years. I'm pretty sure his time is very soon. I still believe there's a 50% chance they won't be physically able to make the trip out here, but the two of them are the two most stubborn people (we're talking stubborn to the level of stupidity and loss of self-preservation instinct) that I have ever met. He was one of the best pistol shots I've ever come across. I have my problems with the man, but he showed me and my 2 daughters nothing but love when we came into his family and I feel I owe it to him out of respect for him and my wife. He requires lots of care and my mother-in-law is exhausting herself trying to do it alone.

They say they'll stay two nights. My mother-in-law. For 2 nights. In a rather small house. I may need one of y'all to bail me out. The $ will be substantial. Prayers are appreciated. ('Serious about the prayer part.)

Any of y'all had similar experiences? Sanity tips? I'm here to learn. up


...and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. Gen. 1:28
Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456601 11/23/21 12:25 AM
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Good for you for trying to pull it off. angel

Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456613 11/23/21 12:31 AM
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You got this cheers


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Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456616 11/23/21 12:32 AM
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Oh, I'm not looking for kudos, believe me. Although I appreciate the sentiment. I'm genuinely looking or suggestions. To make it through the weekend without ruining it by blowing up, or being incarcerated, or both.


...and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. Gen. 1:28
Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456626 11/23/21 12:39 AM
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Patience.

Think some day, hopefully someone will do it for you if need be.

Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: stxranchman] #8456627 11/23/21 12:40 AM
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Originally Posted by stxranchman
You got this cheers


X2

If I can guide Stx around in the panhandle and west Texas , you can do it cheers


Donate to TX Youth hunting program.... better to donate then to waste it in taxes

https://secure.qgiv.com/for/gtgoh/mobile
Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: BOBO the Clown] #8456634 11/23/21 12:43 AM
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Originally Posted by BOBO the Clown
Originally Posted by stxranchman
You got this cheers


X2

If I can guide Stx around in the panhandle and west Texas , you can do it cheers


Stx has no vices. He's gonna be with us for a loooong time. grin

(Church of Christ or the Pentacostals would be very happy to have him. Hint. Hint!)

Last edited by Creekrunner; 11/23/21 12:45 AM.

...and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. Gen. 1:28
Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456635 11/23/21 12:43 AM
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Think of the respect you mentioned you have for him. Great you are doing this for him.

Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456646 11/23/21 12:52 AM
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Sir, I would do like you are currently. Accommodate their visit, and let it play out as it may.

My ex-FIL was a lifelong smoker and had emphysema, he couldn't walk 20' in the snow on his own but we hunted and fished a lot together. Hunting Nebraska, he would drive me all over the State for days....park the truck and sleep while I spent many many hours out trampling through the snow & ice alone chasing pheasants or WT deer. I didn't have much family, and eventually considered them my own. I loved that man and his family very much. After I divorced his daughter I learned that they all hated me (of course). They believed her side of the story and no one ever even asked me about anything. Is what it is, but it breaks my heart to know that man hated me when he died. I still love that old man, and appreciate/remember the good times.

Oh, and if you need bail money just holler at me. up

Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456651 11/23/21 12:54 AM
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Originally Posted by Creekrunner
Originally Posted by BOBO the Clown
Originally Posted by stxranchman
You got this cheers


X2

If I can guide Stx around in the panhandle and west Texas , you can do it cheers


Stx has no vices. He's gonna be with us for a loooong time. grin

(Church of Christ or the Pentacostals would be very happy to have him. Hint. Hint!)


Lol. Probably why we get along so well. I'’m same way



Go have fun creek. Best way to do it. Have fun and don't forget to laugh


Donate to TX Youth hunting program.... better to donate then to waste it in taxes

https://secure.qgiv.com/for/gtgoh/mobile
Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456653 11/23/21 12:56 AM
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I seriously doubt he, himself, hated you. You hear stories after a divorce that don't jibe with the people you knew. I like to believe that my ex's dad would jump in the car if I drove up to the DFW suburban hell he's living in.


...and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. Gen. 1:28
Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456658 11/23/21 01:03 AM
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This will be easy, you will have a good memory for a long time. up


Combat Infantryman, the ultimate hunter where the prey shoots back.
_____________"Illegitimus non carborundum est"_______________

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Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456659 11/23/21 01:03 AM
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Originally Posted by Creekrunner
I seriously doubt he, himself, hated you. You hear stories after a divorce that don't jibe with the people you knew. I like to believe that my ex's dad would jump in the car if I drove up to the DFW suburban hell he's living in.



You're right Creek.

Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456860 11/23/21 05:47 AM
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You'll get through it and bless you for making it all possible.

Do your best to accommodate them both and summons all your patience.

It doesn't sound as if He has a lot of time left....and is no doubt keenly aware of it.

It's just the right thing to do (you know that). Your reward will be the solace that comes with knowing you did everything you could (while you could) for the man.

Good job Sir.


Spartans ask not...how many, but where!
Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456865 11/23/21 06:03 AM
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Good for you man and God bless you. My father is 85. He too is on oxygen and uses a walker now and while at home with my mom he is on hospice care. He has COPD, Emphysema and a slow developing cancer (Doc says he should die from other things before it takes him). He's fallen down numerous times but thank God hasn't broken anything. We almost lost him the last time he had pneumonia. Every XMAS I too think it may be his last. I take my now grown sons (but still in college and at home) to see him every chance I get.

Some of my best memories in life are from hunting and fishing with him. It's because of him I have a passion for both. I'd literally give anything I own to be able to do them with him again.

Have patience and think about how you would like someone to help you do something similar at that point in your life. I'll hunt as long as I can myself - but with me while I don't like to think about it - at 58 I have way more hunting days behind me than I do in front of me.

Earl


Last edited by Earl; 11/23/21 06:08 AM.

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Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456876 11/23/21 07:30 AM
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The third member of of our lease had been on it over 25 years. As he became elderly he could no longer walk to his blind and was on oxygen. We came up with the idea to put a feeder visible from the kitchen window of our camp house. I brought up a table of correct height for a rifle to place against the window opening. We set up a lead sled for a rest. And a muzzle brake added to his rifle to knock the recoil down. By hunting from the house he could sit at the kitchen table on an oxygen machine with his coffee and watch the feeder from there. We also started pitching in to pay for his lease spot at that point. He did not get to come very often, but the setup allowed him to come hunt during his last years. His last season or two he still hunted, but no longer pulled the trigger on anything. He just enjoyed going and hunting his kitchen window stand. He is gone, but next season his grandson will be filling the old man's spot.

You will do fine and after he is gone you will look back on the day in a different light I promise. Just be near him around any obstacles so he does not fall. For example getting in the blind. And I can tell you from experience, I would not fire up the smoky outdoor fire pit while he is around due to his breathing issues. It will cause problems even if he does not tell you.

Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456900 11/23/21 12:12 PM
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Good luck Creek. Remember patience and to go very slow when you are with him up


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Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456903 11/23/21 12:17 PM
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Patience.
I took my grandpa when he was in a wheelchair, we had to lift him in and out of the Jeep into the wheelchair.
His fingers were so stiff and crippled it was hard for him to pull the trigger.
He was a lifelong deer hunter and started the family into the sport.
Now grandkids, great grandkids and great great grandkids hunt deer.
My grandpa hunted until he couldn’t no more, he didn’t get a deer the last couple years but he enjoyed every minute of him.
Now I’m a grandpa and I still miss my grandpa and wish I would have done more.
I have tons of memories with that great man.

Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456925 11/23/21 01:06 PM
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Good luck sir

Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456931 11/23/21 01:08 PM
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I have taken many older folks on hunts...some were their very first hunt at age 83 to their last hunt at age 92. Guided an elderly gentleman this season who had some serious health issues who had a very successful hunt in the pouring rain. What I learned was patience and that everything takes longer. Much longer. Plan ahead for everything you can think of and leave earlier to get into the stand. Popup or ground blinds work the best IME. You can set them in a comfortable chair then set the popup blind back over them and then tie it down. I would road feed several day before the hunts so the deer were used to the routine. What I tell myself is "it is only X amount of days" .... I=know I can make it enjoyable for everyone. Every hunt I did was worth the extra effort. Everyone.
I was with my Dad on his last hunt back in 2012 and wrote this thread about it.
https://texashuntingforum.com/forum/ubbthreads.php/topics/3938857/1


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Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8456960 11/23/21 01:36 PM
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I invited a young man to our lease to hunt for a weekend. While in college he was in a horrible wreck and ended up confined to a wheelchair. He loved to hunt so I contacted him and invited him.

It took some effort - moving around in the brush and camp in a wheelchair was a challenge at best. I had set up several pop up blinds ahead of time and we sat in those. He took a heck of a management buck and was thrilled to death. In retrospect I too was nervous about it all but once it happened it was something he nor I will ever forget. You will manage your way through with this elderly gentleman and I predict it will be a life long memory for you.


You can't fix stupid
Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: stxranchman] #8457245 11/23/21 07:16 PM
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Originally Posted by stxranchman
I have taken many older folks on hunts...some were their very first hunt at age 83 to their last hunt at age 92.


Yes, reminds of an older gentleman...born and raised in the small community I live in. He was in his late 70's when he contracted cancer. I would see him sometimes at our Rural Post Office or occasionally in town. It was very sad to see him slowly withering away. Some days I would see him 'Marvin' just driving up and down our FM road. Back and forth, slowly. No doubt reminiscing of days gone by and all the years he had traveled that road.

He was well known and liked by all in our community. His wife had died a few years earlier and his only Son lived out of town. So neighbors and friends would check in on him. Not a man of means....lived in a small ramshackle house on a small parcel of land. But a good man.

I saw him one day at the Post Office and it appeared to me that he really didn't have much time left. I asked him if he needed anything or if there was anything I could do for him. He looked at me and replied that there WAS one thing he would like to do. He told me he would like to go Squirrel Hunting one last time. It was mid October and Squirrel season in East Texas was open. I don't have that many squirrels on my property but my Father-in-Law does on his. In fact...I had been bow-hunting just the week before on that property and noticed the draw I was in was crawling with Fox and Gray Squirrels.

So I told Marvin I knew just the place and that I would pick him up the next morning, drive him out there and walk him to the spot. I'm sure sometime in his past he hunted that area...as its not far from his home and the previous owners (years ago) knew him. Anyway....the next morning was picture perfect, cool but not cold, no wind. The sun had been up for maybe 15 minutes by the time I got him walked in and settled against a tree. The area is mostly Red Oaks, White Oaks and Shag Bark Hickory. I asked Marvin when he would like for me to come and get him. He would only be sitting (unable to walk around that terrain). He said a couple of hours.

I went to my in-laws house to visit while waiting. It wasn't so far away that I wouldn't be able to hear a shot. Never did hear any shots despite seeing squirrels on my way out. I was half afraid Marvin was going to shoot himself (to end it all) while down there....but put it out of mind.

I went and got him at our agreed upon time. He was sitting right where I left him. Shotgun propped up against the tree, not across his lap. I asked him if he'd had any 'luck'? He replied he hadn't really seen anything. I knew that wasn't true, no way he didn't have squirrels. It was clear to me he just wanted to be out there. Time to think, time to come to terms. Things a man does when his days are numbered. Bittersweet. Sad that your time is over. Thankful for all the time you were allowed.

He didn't say much more. We got him back into my vehicle and I took him home. He shook my hand and thanked me. I heard about a week later that he had died.

I was only in my 30's then....but it gave me a sense of my own mortality and thoughts that when/if I were to grow that old and face the same thing, that I would be able to do it with as much dignity and courage as he did. Marvin was not related to me...nor did I know him all that well, but he left an impression on me.

So if you ever have the opportunity/privilege to do a elderly person a kindness....don't fail to do it. Whatever it takes.

Last edited by flintknapper; 11/23/21 07:41 PM.

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Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8457287 11/23/21 07:56 PM
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My MIL, before the last year when she was overcome by the cancer she battled for almost 3 decades
, And I had a similar relationship. She was sweet but we had different ideas on certain things which drove a wedge input relationship. She was very welcoming and loved my girls, her favorite job was to be a grandma. Anyhow this past year I got passed myself and extended the olive branch as you are doing. It was difficult at first because she was still being stubborn but I kept on and I think when she finally realized I wasn't a monster but instead just had different views she apologized for one of our last big arguments. We forgave each other and man our relationship was great from then till she passed. She trusted me more than my wife towards the end which is huge.

So just be kind and be accommodating, I didn't compromise any beliefs just treated her kindly and didn't allow myself to get angry as before. I'm sad it took so long and circumstances to get back to how we first engaged ine another when I was first courting her daughter.

Keep doing what you are doing thungs will sort themselves out.


Don't take life so seriously, you'll never make it out alive!
Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8457296 11/23/21 08:20 PM
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Smells like onions in here..........

Re: Hosting elderly hunters. [Re: Creekrunner] #8457333 11/23/21 08:58 PM
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Just keep reminding yourself that it is his last hunt and then count down the hours.


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LETS GO BRANDON!!!
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