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The Worst Hunt #8334388 07/28/21 10:09 PM
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DirtNapTET Offline OP
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We've all had that Hunt / Hunting Trip - If something could go wrong, it did.

Mine happened on a crisp December morning hunt 2-3 years ago in Archer County...


Wind was wrong for my honey hole blind, so decided to hunt my buddies blind. Not too close to my hh but the closest of any other stand and the wind was perfect for it.

The most reasonable place to park was about 250-300 yds from the blind, we call it the Oil Headquarters. It's where the oil folks keep a tractor or 2, 4 wheeler, konex box, old oil equipment, etc. Sounds cluttered but they keep it pretty well organized and orderly.

The night before, we decided against cooking over the fire and ran in town to AllSups to get some fresh Beef and Beans.

Of course, I was prepared for this, and it was no surprise when the Burritos came calling as soon as I put my car in park at the HQ that next morning. I grab my half roll of TP and went to go find a spot to lean back from.

It's dark, cloudy, no moon. Got my flashlight out trying to find a comfy yet covert spot. The oil guy(s) went through there nearly every day.

Aha! Mounted on the back side of an old 100lb Propane tank was this thin, vertical, metal pipe between 2 twist valves - The perfect handle and no one uses this old thing right??

Drop the drawers, grab hold of my handle, let loose, and SNAP!

That "metal pipe" was actually an old dirty/dusty Glass tube connecting the 2 valves. Thankfully though, I kept my footing, but the tube shattered in my hand.

I didnt even have time to think about how "muddy" my boots suddenly became because of the piercing 'SSSHHHHHHHHHHH' coming out of the broken tube on the propane tank!

I scramble back through the "mud" and try desperately to tighten the 2 valves shut, but they're barely budging. Eventually after 30 seconds or so (felt like 20 min), the hissing stops.

Ok, that couldnt have gone any worse, but it's alright. It's still not shooting light, I've got time to get to the blind and let things calm down.

I clean up as best I can, exhausting every sq of TP I have. I even cut a piece of mesquite limb off to brush over my boot prints around the crime scene area.


Finally, I get to the base of the blind. Get about half way up and feel an innocent, very trustworthy, small little butt-burp, so yea -

Nope, not a fart!

I Scramble back down the ladder that I had just climbed up in my "MUDDY" A$$ BOOTS and proceeded to just desecrate the entry trail to my poor buddies blind..

Oh yea, no TP! Cut out my undies, but those things were shot, Gloves were covered in "Mud" too. Poop, everywhere.

I've made it this far though, F it, I'm hunting this morning damn it!


With Mud Butt worse than a Bull Hippo, by god I climbed back up in that blind, leaned my rifle in the corner and got settled the best I could. This couldn't get any worse, right?

After a few minutes I reach for my Binocs to see if by some miracle there was anything still in the area.

Nope, forgot the binoculars, of course.

IMO, There are few things worse than having to use your rifle scope in replacement of Binos - But hey, I've made it this far, I'm doing this.

Now this stand is a Pop-Up blind tied down on a 8-10 ft platform. Because the windows arent something you want to rest your rifle on when taking a longer shot, we keep shooting sticks in all the blinds that we have set up like that.


Still curious if there's anything out there (still just a bit too dark to make much out)...

So I grab my rifle with one hand and with the other grab for the shooting sticks.

Suddenly pow pow pow, felt like a grabbed a handful of Lit BlackCats!!

Yellow Jackets had bunched up on the foam grips of the shooting sticks to keep warm and boy did they let me have it. At least 3-4 stings on my hand and fingers. Words cant describe..

I honestly dont recall the couple/few minutes following the stings. I'm not allergic or anything, I think I just blacked out from pure rage at that point. Have never yelled so many obscenities in my life.

Hopped down, got myself cleaned up at camp, and was headed home before anyone else got out of their blind that morning.

Never hunted that blind again.

Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8334435 07/28/21 10:54 PM
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Might as well go in strong.

Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8334445 07/28/21 11:02 PM
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I admire your perseverance to stay at it. I woulda headed back to the cabin at the first "mishap". I keep TP everywhere and always carry a bandana to "sacrifice" if needed. THIS foray deserved a Go Pro. up


...and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. Gen. 1:28
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8334455 07/28/21 11:10 PM
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Never pick up a bandana in the pasture, never.

Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8334842 07/29/21 11:35 AM
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roflmao


................still better than a good day at work though!!!!!!!!!


lmao


High fence, low fence, no fence, it really doesn't matter as long as you're hunting!
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: Hudbone] #8334848 07/29/21 11:37 AM
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Originally Posted by Hudbone
Never pick up a bandana in the pasture, never.


Absolutely right!
Just ask my cousin-in-law. He picked up his BILs hanky on the way back to their cabin in CO one year thinking how lucky it was that he'd found it for him. Had it in his jacket pocket for the better part of half mile back to the cabin. When he pulled it out to hand it to him he started laughing like hell. He told him the brown stains on it were not oil stains from wiping his gun off and it was only then he'd realized he'd been carrying his azz cleaner back with him that morning. roflmao


High fence, low fence, no fence, it really doesn't matter as long as you're hunting!
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8334873 07/29/21 11:56 AM
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roflmao


Are idiots multiplying faster than normal people?[Linked Image]
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8334951 07/29/21 12:59 PM
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I go to Wurstfest first two weekends of every season. Got on new deer lease 15 years ago and there were going to be big bucks every where. Got my 6' diameter circle black plastic trash can blind in the center of a 668 acre pasture and was gonna have at it. Made sure it was all clean about two weeks prior to season. Had to be at Wurstfest Friday night, but for some odd reason had Saturday off. That was opening day of deer season. Closed down the festival, went home immediately, got up at 3:30 and headed south. Drove on to the ranch, did not pass go and went directly into my pasture. My timing was a little late and although the sun had not yet erupted over the horizon the start of the day was coming on. It was warm. I had on a short sleeve collared shirt and a cap without a top on it. got to the top, opened what was then a half door, bent over and looked at my black plastic seat. Someone had obviously been to my blind and thrown trash on that there seat. I was furious and swiped away at the trash with force enough to hit the sides of the plastic blind.

That's when I realized it was not trash. I was fairly perceptive because the blind came alive. There I was - on my hands and knees in the dark, attempting to navigate through a half door as a gazillion yellow jackets beat their wings enough to make the entire blind vibrate like a huge zither. There I found myself on my hands & knees (a first time) as they began to fall on my head and down my collared shirt as I attempted to extricate myself from this situation. I put it in reverse and when my hands got on to the handlebars on the small 8 inch deep landing, I thrust myself off the ten foot tower making a perfect two point landing (just like a cat) whereupon I immediately started rolling in the vain attempt to crush the multitudes of yellow jackets on my back and within the confines of my shirt all while smothering the dozen or so on my head with my hands. Prickly pear be damned, that was just a little collateral damage. So was the hyper-ventilating.

Got my heart going. It was a great way to start the day. There are more.

Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8335118 07/29/21 03:13 PM
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I gave up on TP years ago for my industrial grade #2's- paper towels are sturdier and provide more "coverage".....

Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8335133 07/29/21 03:23 PM
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I think lots of us learned to carry TP to the blind after having to cut off undies for emergency use.


Dalroo
Deep in the Heart of Texas
How about that Brandon!
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8335135 07/29/21 03:26 PM
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The blue paper towels are a must in the pasture. I keep a roll on the mule all season.



Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8335307 07/29/21 05:25 PM
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Damn Hud.........
Sure glad you weren't allergic to them stinging little bastages.


High fence, low fence, no fence, it really doesn't matter as long as you're hunting!
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8335379 07/29/21 06:12 PM
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"a cap without a top on it", hmmmm, I learn so much on this forum....


At some point in life its time to quit chasing the pot of gold and just enjoy the rainbow. FR
Keep your gratitude higher than your expectations. RWH
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: freerange] #8335434 07/29/21 06:50 PM
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Originally Posted by freerange
"a cap without a top on it", hmmmm, I learn so much on this forum....

I'm guessing like a visor ...


"everyone that lives dies but not everyone who dies lived..."

~PMK~
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8335444 07/29/21 06:55 PM
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oh yeah, that's what they call them

Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8335582 07/29/21 08:47 PM
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Hud, your adventure is similar to one I had ... I have a shipping crate (5x8x7) I hauled to my Ozona place, use as a "camp" spot (could put a cot in, have a potty chair, has windows so could use as a blind along with some storage). surrounded by knee high cut off jagged cedar stumps from the drought. I bounced up and swung open the door to find a hybrid monster sized yellow jacket / hornet nest about the size of a football immediately inside the door. It was daylight but about 14 gazillion of these Godzilla sized stinging flying creatures came pouring out and they were really ticked off. I started running backwards, flailing like I was on fire tripping over multiple stumps to get the heck out of their range. Only got hit by a few, but I think a taser would be less painful (but won't test that theory). I grabbed a couple cans of wasp spray out of my truck, let them settle down a bit before going back and hosing down the inside of my "camp". I had two knots the size of a big marble under my skin for over 6 months where two of them got me. I am overly cautious now-a-days when opening anything out there.


"everyone that lives dies but not everyone who dies lived..."

~PMK~
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8335598 07/29/21 09:05 PM
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They only go after sweet ones.

Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: 68rustbucket] #8335618 07/29/21 09:23 PM
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Originally Posted by 68rustbucket
The blue paper towels are a must in the pasture. I keep a roll on the mule all season.


Excellent idea. I'll be upgrading my buggy next week. up

And my last lease buddies made fun of me for always checking for stinging, flying, pissed-off insects, every time we checked out a blind at the beginning of the season. When you're dad buys a long-abandoned farm, with, 'seems like, ten abandoned animal out buildings between the house and the road, you learn quick!


...and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. Gen. 1:28
Re: The Worst Hunt [Re: DirtNapTET] #8338858 08/02/21 02:51 PM
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The older you get TP is a must everywhere truck, boat, SXS, etc.
You could sneeze, or cough and thing go bad really quick. Down side of getting older but better than the alternative.

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