texashuntingforum.com logo
Main Menu
Advertisement
Affiliates
Advertisement
Newest Members
TraeMartin, Beatixre, MooseSteed, Trappernewt, casyoo
71987 Registered Users
Top Posters(All Time)
dogcatcher 110,788
bill oxner 91,416
SnakeWrangler 65,416
stxranchman 60,296
Gravytrain 46,950
RKHarm24 44,585
rifleman 44,461
Stub 43,769
Forum Statistics
Forums46
Topics537,014
Posts9,719,426
Members86,987
Most Online25,604
Feb 12th, 2024
Print Thread
Pearly Gates #8187371 03/01/21 02:55 AM
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 110,788
dogcatcher Online Content OP
THF Celebrity
OP Online Content
THF Celebrity
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 110,788
At the Pearly Gates.


Petitioner to St Peter that his last day was not a good one!

"I came home early and found my wife lying naked in bed. She claimed she had just got out of the shower. Well, her hair was dry and I checked the shower and it was completely dry too. I knew she was into some hanky-panky and I began to look for her lover.

I went onto the balcony of our 9th-floor apartment and found the guy clinging to the rail by his fingertips. I was so angry that I began bashing his fingers with a flower pot. He let go and fell, but his fall was broken by some awnings and bushes. On seeing he was still alive I found super human strength to drag our antique cedar chest to the balcony and throw it over. It hit the man and killed him.
At this point the stress got to me and I suffered a massive heart attack and died.”

Saint Peter thanked him for his story and sent him on to the waiting room.

The second applicant said that his last day was his worst. "I was on the roof of an apartment building working on the AC equipment and I stumbled over my tools and toppled off the building. I managed to grab onto the balcony rail of a 9th-floor apartment but some idiot came rushing out on the balcony and bashed my hands with a flower pot.
I fell but hit some awnings and bushes and survived, but as I looked up I saw a huge chest falling toward me. I tried to crawl out of the way but failed and was hit and killed by the chest.”

Saint Peter couldn't help but chuckle as he directs the man to the waiting room.
Saint Peter is still chuckling when his third customer of the day enters.

He apologizes and says "I doubt that your last day was as interesting as the two fellows that arrived here just before you.

"I don't know," replies the man. "Picture this, I'm naked, hiding in this cedar chest...


Combat Infantryman, the ultimate hunter where the prey shoots back.
_____________"Illegitimus non carborundum est"_______________

[Linked Image]
Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8187409 03/01/21 03:18 AM
Joined: Nov 2014
Posts: 2,085
T
tex70 Offline
Veteran Tracker
Offline
Veteran Tracker
T
Joined: Nov 2014
Posts: 2,085
clap

Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8187622 03/01/21 12:24 PM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416
bill oxner Offline
THF Celebrity
Offline
THF Celebrity
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416
My daddy made a cedar chest years ago.


Quail hunting is like walking into, and out of a beautiful painting all day long. Gene Hill


[Linked Image]




Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8187689 03/01/21 01:43 PM
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 4,434
1
1955 Online Content
Extreme Tracker
Online Content
Extreme Tracker
1
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 4,434
clap

Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8187739 03/01/21 02:08 PM
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 19,016
TCM3 Online Content
THF Celebrity
Online Content
THF Celebrity
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 19,016
rofl rofl


Do not forget to entertain strangers, For by so doing some have unwittingly entertained angels
Hebrews 13:2
Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8187746 03/01/21 02:12 PM
Joined: Aug 2017
Posts: 2,755
S
spacejunkie Offline
Veteran Tracker
Offline
Veteran Tracker
S
Joined: Aug 2017
Posts: 2,755
roflmao

Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8188038 03/01/21 05:41 PM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,019
D
deerhunter1956 Online Content
Veteran Tracker
Online Content
Veteran Tracker
D
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,019
clap roflmao

Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8188497 03/01/21 11:25 PM
Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 19,129
B
Biscuit Offline
THF Celebrity
Offline
THF Celebrity
B
Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 19,129
😊

Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8188735 03/02/21 02:41 AM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 11,857
S
Simple Searcher Offline
THF Celebrity
Offline
THF Celebrity
S
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 11,857
clap


[Linked Image]

"Man is still a hunter, still a simple searcher after meat..." Robert C. Ruark
Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8188908 03/02/21 09:05 AM
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,125
1
10pointers Offline
THF Trophy Hunter
Offline
THF Trophy Hunter
1
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 9,125
up up


Signature images may not be larger than 600 pixels wide by 125 pixels tall. That smile says it all
[North Dakota -16degrees

"Things may come to those who wait, but only those things left by those who hustle."
- Abraham Lincoln
Re: Pearly Gates [Re: dogcatcher] #8189885 03/03/21 12:22 AM
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,479
L
LovinLakeLife Online Content
Pro Tracker
Online Content
Pro Tracker
L
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,479
roflmao
roflmao

Previous Thread
Index
Next Thread

© 2004-2024 OUTDOOR SITES NETWORK all rights reserved USA and Worldwide
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.3