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Feb 5th, 2020
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 Hunting Accident
#7902760
07/16/20 03:24 PM
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Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 3,300
redhaze
OP
Veteran Tracker
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OP
Veteran Tracker
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 3,300 |
A man was hunting when a gust of wind blew the gun over and it discharged shooting him in the genitals.
Several hours later lying in a hospital bed he was approached by his doctor. "Well sir, I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you are going to be okay. The damage was local to your groin, there was very little internal damage and we were able to remove all of the buckshot."
"What is the bad news?" asked the hunter.
"The bad news is that there was some pretty extensive damage done to your willy which left quite a few holes in it. I'm going to have to refer you to my sister." said the doctor.
"I guess that is not to bad," said the hunter. "Is she a plastic surgeon?' he asked.
"Not exactly," said the doctor. "She is a flute player in the Boston Symphony Orchestra and she is going to teach you where to place your fingers so you don't piss in your eye."
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7902777
07/16/20 03:36 PM
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416
bill oxner
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416 |
Quail hunting is like walking into, and out of a beautiful painting all day long. Gene Hill ![[Linked Image]](https://texashuntingforum.com/forum/pics/usergals/2017/07/full-3669-105539-full_16668_105507_image.jpg)
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7902787
07/16/20 03:44 PM
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 9,952
LFD2037
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 9,952 |
Ha!! I just LOL’d in the Dr. waiting room. Good job!
R.I.P. CPO Matt Mills-(DEVGRU)- You will NEVER be forgotten!
10-25-75 / 8-6-11 *K.I.A.*
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7902950
07/16/20 06:09 PM
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Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 481
Ders26
Bird Dog
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Bird Dog
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 481 |
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7903191
07/16/20 09:52 PM
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 7,951
Team Hillbilly
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 7,951 |
Team Hillbilly
I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
Paralyzed Veterans of America
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7903443
07/17/20 01:19 AM
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Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 16,464
TCM3
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 16,464 |
![[Linked Image]](https://i.postimg.cc/4d0DYLbG/image.png) I'm what the Indians call a Vegetarian.
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7903582
07/17/20 04:05 AM
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Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,096
Cajun Raider
Pro Tracker
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Pro Tracker
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,096 |
Don't talk the talk if you didn't walk the walk.
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7904254
07/17/20 09:23 PM
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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 18,293
HuntingTexas
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 18,293 |
OK that was 
" In God We Trust "
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7904306
07/17/20 10:02 PM
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 27,353
TXHOGSLAYER
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 27,353 |
5303
LETS GO BRANDON
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7915305
07/27/20 10:11 PM
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Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 2,831
RedHoss
Veteran Tracker
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Veteran Tracker
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 2,831 |
"Good One"!
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7930440
08/10/20 07:36 PM
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 11,406
colt45
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 11,406 |
hold on Newt, we got a runaway
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7931038
08/11/20 02:41 AM
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 64,607
NORML as can be
^^Cut the Cord^^
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^^Cut the Cord^^
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 64,607 |
(R-TX) .-- " TCNN CURL CRLB VFF OGI SNDL CGC TLRY "
_=====___=________==-
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7931857
08/11/20 08:57 PM
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Joined: Nov 2012
Posts: 14,537
QuitShootinYoungBucks
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Nov 2012
Posts: 14,537 |
Guy runs to town: 'Doc, my friend got bit by a rattlesnake! What do I do?'
'Well, you make a small incision on each fanghole, and suck out the poison.'
Guy runs back to friend. Friend-'what'd the doc say?'
'He said since you got bit on the pecker, you gonna die.'
![[Linked Image]](http://www.katiecortese.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/texas-tech-logo-2-150x150.jpg) https://web.archive.org/web/20170223065011/http:/www.rrdvegas.com/silencer-cleaning.html
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7934306
08/13/20 08:38 PM
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 39,960
Stub
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 39,960 |
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: QuitShootinYoungBucks]
#7934433
08/13/20 10:11 PM
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 11,406
colt45
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 11,406 |
Guy runs to town: 'Doc, my friend got bit by a rattlesnake! What do I do?'
'Well, you make a small incision on each fanghole, and suck out the poison.'
Guy runs back to friend. Friend-'what'd the doc say?'
'He said since you got bit on the pecker, you gonna die.' it was on his tally whacker
hold on Newt, we got a runaway
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Re: Hunting Accident
[Re: redhaze]
#7936349
08/15/20 04:28 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 110,616
dogcatcher
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 110,616 |
Combat Infantryman, the ultimate hunter where the prey shoots back.
_____________"Illegitimus non carborundum est"_______________![[Linked Image]](https://texashuntingforum.com/forum/pics/usergals/2018/09/full-3152-162968-charge_air_assault.jpg)
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