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Aussie Ventriloquist
#7836959
05/12/20 01:09 PM
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Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 3,458
redhaze
OP
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OP
Veteran Tracker
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 3,458 |
An Australian ventriloquist visiting New Zealand walks into a small village and sees an old farmer sitting on his porch petting his dog. He figures he will have a little fun, so he says to the farmer, "G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?"
Old Farmer, "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie."
Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going mate?"
Dog (via ventriloquist): "Doin' all right."
Old Farmer: (look of extreme shock)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (pointing to farmer)
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me good food and takes me to the lake to play once a week."
Old Farmer: (look of utter disbelief)
Ventriloquist : "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Old Farmer: "Horse doesn't talk either, ....I think."
Ventriloquist : "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool."
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."
Old Farmer: (look of total amazement)
Ventriloquist : "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
After a long pause.....
Old Farmer: (in a panic) "The sheep's a f**kin' liar!"
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Re: Aussie Ventriloquist
[Re: redhaze]
#7837122
05/12/20 03:11 PM
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416
bill oxner
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416 |
Quail hunting is like walking into, and out of a beautiful painting all day long. Gene Hill
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Re: Aussie Ventriloquist
[Re: redhaze]
#7837130
05/12/20 03:14 PM
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 22,630
Cast
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 22,630 |
Cast I have a short attention spa
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Re: Aussie Ventriloquist
[Re: redhaze]
#7837280
05/12/20 05:16 PM
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Joined: Nov 2014
Posts: 2,087
tex70
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Veteran Tracker
Joined: Nov 2014
Posts: 2,087 |
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Re: Aussie Ventriloquist
[Re: redhaze]
#7837382
05/12/20 06:32 PM
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Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 488
Ders26
Bird Dog
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Bird Dog
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 488 |
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Re: Aussie Ventriloquist
[Re: redhaze]
#7837432
05/12/20 07:52 PM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 110,795
dogcatcher
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 110,795 |
Combat Infantryman, the ultimate hunter where the prey shoots back. _____________"Illegitimus non carborundum est"_______________
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Re: Aussie Ventriloquist
[Re: redhaze]
#7837779
05/13/20 12:29 AM
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,031
deerhunter1956
Veteran Tracker
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Veteran Tracker
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,031 |
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Re: Aussie Ventriloquist
[Re: redhaze]
#7837808
05/13/20 12:49 AM
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Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 11,904
Simple Searcher
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 11,904 |
"Man is still a hunter, still a simple searcher after meat..." Robert C. Ruark
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Re: Aussie Ventriloquist
[Re: redhaze]
#7837831
05/13/20 01:05 AM
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Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 19,132
TCM3
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 19,132 |
Do not forget to entertain strangers, For by so doing some have unwittingly entertained angels Hebrews 13:2 (R-TX)
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