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Paraprosdokians
#7800880
04/09/20 03:27 PM
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416
bill oxner
OP
THF Celebrity
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OP
THF Celebrity
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416 |
Here you go all you shut ins
1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ...but it's still on my list.
3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.
6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.
7. Knowledge, is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of an emergency, notify..." I answered "a doctor."
11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
13. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
16. You're never too old to learn something stupid.
17. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find someone older than me.
Quail hunting is like walking into, and out of a beautiful painting all day long. Gene Hill
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Re: Paraprosdokians
[Re: bill oxner]
#7800882
04/09/20 03:32 PM
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Joined: Nov 2014
Posts: 7,047
mikei
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Nov 2014
Posts: 7,047 |
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Re: Paraprosdokians
[Re: bill oxner]
#7801272
04/09/20 10:01 PM
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Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,344
Ag Hunter 78
Pro Tracker
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Pro Tracker
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,344 |
18). When your girlfriend asks you to name all your sex partners in order, it's a good idea to stop when you get to her name.
No prayer in school....What's next, no thinking in church? It's not just about pie in the sky when you die. It's also about steak on your plate while you wait!
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Re: Paraprosdokians
[Re: bill oxner]
#7801316
04/09/20 10:46 PM
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Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 5,560
Slow Drifter
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 5,560 |
19) Smart men ask questions. 20) Wise men never ask questions they aren't ready to answer.
"I have no idea what WW-III will be fought with, but WW-IV will be fought with sticks and stones." A. Einstein
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Re: Paraprosdokians
[Re: bill oxner]
#7801700
04/10/20 05:45 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 110,795
dogcatcher
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 110,795 |
Combat Infantryman, the ultimate hunter where the prey shoots back. _____________"Illegitimus non carborundum est"_______________
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