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When Grandma goes to court
#7556050
07/14/19 06:15 PM
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Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 32,499
kmon11
OP
junior
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OP
junior
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 32,499 |
When Grandma goes to court
Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?'
She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.'
lf the saying "Liar, Liar your pants on fire" were true Mainstream news might be fun to watch
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Re: When Grandma goes to court
[Re: kmon11]
#7556066
07/14/19 06:42 PM
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Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 19,133
TCM3
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Mar 2019
Posts: 19,133 |
Do not forget to entertain strangers, For by so doing some have unwittingly entertained angels Hebrews 13:2 (R-TX)
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Re: When Grandma goes to court
[Re: kmon11]
#7556076
07/14/19 06:54 PM
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416
bill oxner
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 91,416 |
Quail hunting is like walking into, and out of a beautiful painting all day long. Gene Hill
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Re: When Grandma goes to court
[Re: kmon11]
#7556083
07/14/19 07:01 PM
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Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 65,525
SnakeWrangler
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 65,525 |
I believe in science and I’m an insufferable [censored] Actually, BBC is pretty damn good "You Cannot Simultaneously Be Politically Correct And Intellectually Honest!"
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Re: When Grandma goes to court
[Re: kmon11]
#7558295
07/17/19 03:09 AM
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 4,753
Nathan Nelson
Extreme Tracker
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Extreme Tracker
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 4,753 |
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Re: When Grandma goes to court
[Re: kmon11]
#7566240
07/28/19 05:39 PM
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Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 3,261
Sniper.270
Veteran Tracker
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Veteran Tracker
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 3,261 |
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