texashuntingforum.com logo
Main Menu
Advertisement
Affiliates
Advertisement
Newest Members
MIUAYG, LJONES, thardy21, jenque84, twistedtine
65782 Registered Users
Top Posters(All Time)
dogcatcher 94,342
bill oxner 57,494
stxranchman 55,200
SnakeWrangler 47,101
RKHarm24 44,585
rifleman 44,436
BMD 41,029
Big Orn 37,484
Facebook
Forum Statistics
Forums45
Topics437,897
Posts6,354,508
Members65,782
Most Online16,728
Mar 25th, 2012
Print Thread
Letter to pets #7472144 03/29/19 04:19 AM
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 25,929
kmon1 Offline OP
junior
OP Offline
junior
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 25,929
Dear pets,

When I say to move, it means to go someplace else, not switch positions with each other so there are still two of you in the way.

The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help you because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king size bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue to sleep on the couch to ensure your comfort. Look at videos of dogs and cats sleeping, they can actually curl up in a ball. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space used is not but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, try to turn the knob, or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. When I exit this room, I will come out the same door that I entered. In addition, I have been using the bathroom for years. Canine/Feline attendance has never been necessary.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other animal or your butt. I cannot stress this enough. It would be such a simple change for you.

In return for you following these simple rules, I have posted the following message on our front door:

Rules for Non-Pet Owners Who Visit and Like to Complain About Our Pets

1. They live here. You don't.

2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.

3. I like my pet a lot better than I like most people.

4. To you, it's an animal. To me, they are an adopted child who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Re: Letter to pets [Re: kmon1] #7472211 03/29/19 11:08 AM
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 1,389
F
fray Online Content
Pro Tracker
Online Content
Pro Tracker
F
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 1,389
Just emailed this to my two "human owners", thanks.

Re: Letter to pets [Re: kmon1] #7472240 03/29/19 11:53 AM
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 13,713
T
TEXASLEFTY Offline
THF Celebrity
Offline
THF Celebrity
T
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 13,713
Thatís great!!!


Originally Posted By: Chunky Monkey
Never been to a camping world. I prefer Dick's to be honest.
Re: Letter to pets [Re: kmon1] #7472651 03/29/19 06:47 PM
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 14,963
2Beez Online Happy
THF Celebrity
Online Happy
THF Celebrity
Joined: Jul 2015
Posts: 14,963
clap


[Linked Image]
Re: Letter to pets [Re: kmon1] #7472737 03/29/19 08:45 PM
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 3,914
T
TexasKC Offline
Extreme Tracker
Offline
Extreme Tracker
T
Joined: Dec 2012
Posts: 3,914
I'd read that to my mutt but she wouldn't listen. LOL


I took the road less traveled
Previous Thread
Index
Next Thread

© 2004-2019 OUTDOOR SITES NETWORK all rights reserved USA and Worldwide
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.3