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3 bears; 3 chaplains #7227305 07/17/18 08:00 PM
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A Catholic priest, a Baptist preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University at Marquette in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.

They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.

One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear.

One thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it to their religion. Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences.

Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, went first. 'Well,' he said, 'I went into the woods to find me a bear. When I found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism
Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation.'

Reverend Billy Bob the Baptist, spoke next. He had one arm and both legs in casts. In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, 'WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we Baptists don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD ! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. Just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus. Hallelujah!

The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He had broken arms and legs, was in a body cast and traction, with IVs and monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.

The Rabbi looked up and said: "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start."

Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7227416 07/17/18 09:32 PM
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clap


If you can't laugh at yourself, give me a call. I'll gladly laugh at you.
Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7227420 07/17/18 09:35 PM
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Don't talk the talk if you didn't walk the walk.
Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7227436 07/17/18 09:56 PM
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That made me laugh. clap

Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7227819 07/18/18 02:41 AM
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That was good smile


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Do it right, do it once.
Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7227954 07/18/18 07:15 AM
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Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: TXHOGSLAYER] #7227978 07/18/18 10:48 AM
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Originally Posted By: TXHOGSLAYER
That made me laugh. clap
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Originally Posted By: skinnerback
Milf does the trick.

"You're statistically more likely to be killed by Hillary Clinton than an NRA member. - PolitiDiva

"You Cannot Simultaneously Be Politically Correct And Intellectually Honest!"
Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7227981 07/18/18 10:57 AM
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Press for an AMERICAN.
Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7227982 07/18/18 11:02 AM
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Thatís funny!!


Originally Posted By: Chunky Monkey
Never been to a camping world. I prefer Dick's to be honest.
Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: TEXASLEFTY] #7228218 07/18/18 03:32 PM
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Originally Posted By: TEXASLEFTY
Thatís funny!!


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Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7228260 07/18/18 04:10 PM
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Solid Gold!


An unethical shot is one you take, that you know you shouldn't.
Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7228302 07/18/18 04:56 PM
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Good one!


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Re: 3 bears; 3 chaplains [Re: mikei] #7233855 07/24/18 10:44 AM
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I Feed Indian Corn. The deer love it and all the colors make them stay at the feeder longer.
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