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Mar 25th, 2012
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More "You May Be a Redneck If" #7134553
04/06/18 08:25 PM
04/06/18 08:25 PM
Joined: Nov 2014
Posts: 3,703
Mason, TX
M
mikei Offline OP
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mikei  Offline OP
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Joined: Nov 2014
Posts: 3,703
Mason, TX

1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.

3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years

.4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

5. You think "The Nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.

6.The Salvation Army declines your furniture.

7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.

8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.

9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

12. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.

14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.

16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.

17. You have a rag for a gas cap.

18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

19. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean.

20. You can spit without opening your mouth.

21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say "Cool Whip" on the side.

24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Walmart.

25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.

26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.

27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.

28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.

29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.

Re: More "You May Be a Redneck If" [Re: mikei] #7134679
04/06/18 11:33 PM
04/06/18 11:33 PM
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 17,289
Out of Dallas Co. SOON !!
HuntingTexas Online content
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HuntingTexas  Online Content
THF Celebrity

Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 17,289
Out of Dallas Co. SOON !!
clap rofl
21,23,28 rofl rofl rofl


" In God We Trust "



Re: More "You May Be a Redneck If" [Re: mikei] #7134702
04/07/18 12:01 AM
04/07/18 12:01 AM
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 40,181
Over yonder.....
S
SnakeWrangler Offline
THF Celebrity
SnakeWrangler  Offline
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S

Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 40,181
Over yonder.....
9 up


Originally Posted By: skinnerback
Milf does the trick.

"You're statistically more likely to be killed by Hillary Clinton than an NRA member. - PolitiDiva

"You Cannot Simultaneously Be Politically Correct And Intellectually Honest!"
Re: More "You May Be a Redneck If" [Re: mikei] #7134853
04/07/18 02:16 AM
04/07/18 02:16 AM
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 3,011
North Texas
6
68A Offline
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68A  Offline
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Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 3,011
North Texas
I may or may not know someone who is guilty of 17 and 25

Re: More "You May Be a Redneck If" [Re: mikei] #7134878
04/07/18 02:49 AM
04/07/18 02:49 AM
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 3,226
Lost
L
Lazyjack Offline
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Lazyjack  Offline
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Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 3,226
Lost
18 for sure. Had a piece of chained hemed into it so wind wouldn't blow it.


May we get what we need. May we get what we want. Buy,may we never get what we deserve.- unknown
Re: More "You May Be a Redneck If" [Re: mikei] #7134925
04/07/18 05:17 AM
04/07/18 05:17 AM
Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 4,845
On the farm in Seguin
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missingAK Online content
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missingAK  Online Content
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Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 4,845
On the farm in Seguin
If you've ever made a phone call, from the toilet, while holding a shotgun...in case that dang possum comes back through the hole under the water heater.

True story. And it was my Step-mom.


"Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened." Winston Churchill
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