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Blonde ? Yeah I reckon!
#2862936
12/22/11 11:53 PM
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Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 350
Quick Shoot Again
OP
Bird Dog
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OP
Bird Dog
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 350 |
DISNEY WORLD Two blondes were going to Disney World . They were driving on the Interstate when they saw the sign that said Disney World LEFT. They started crying and turned around and went home.
CAR TROUBLE A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the Mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, 'What's the story?' He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor' She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'
SPEEDING TICKET A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, 'I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!'
RIVER WALK There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank 'Yoo-hoo!' she shouts, 'How can I get to the other side?' The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, ‘HELOOOOOOOOOOOO,You ARE on the other side.'
AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it. 'Impossible!' says the doctor.. 'Show me.' The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream. The doctor said, 'You're not really a redhead, are you? 'Well, no' she said, 'I'm actually a blonde.' 'I thought so,' the doctor said, 'Your finger is broken.'
KNITTING A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, 'PULL OVER!' 'NO!' the blonde yelled back, 'IT'S A SCARF!'
BLONDE ON THE SUN A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, 'We were the first in space!' The American said, 'We were the first on the moon!' The Blonde said, 'So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!' The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. 'You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!' said the Russian. To which the Blonde replied, 'We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!'
FINALLY
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, 'Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?' 'HELLLOOOOOOO...,'answered the blonde. 'They're watch dogs'!
Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body, But rather to skid in sideways, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, Screaming "WHOO HOO What A Ride"
NRA Life Member
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Re: Blonde ? Yeah I reckon!
[Re: Quick Shoot Again]
#2863057
12/23/11 12:27 AM
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 60,296
stxranchman
Obie Juan Kenobi
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Obie Juan Kenobi
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 60,296 |
Are idiots multiplying faster than normal people?
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Re: Blonde ? Yeah I reckon!
[Re: stxranchman]
#2866647
12/24/11 06:57 AM
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Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 2,412
Fyrfyter
Veteran Tracker
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Veteran Tracker
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 2,412 |
My wife WILL be hearing all of these!!! Good job!
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