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#6933185 - 10/25/17 11:59 AM The Duck
Bass&More Offline

Registered: 12/02/11
Posts: 959
Loc: Jack County
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in a village. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.

The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer Peter replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial lawyers in this side of the planet and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in this village. We settle small disagreements like this with the 'Three Kick Rule'."

The lawyer asked, "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?"

The farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."

The lawyer quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney.

His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel-toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees !

His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth.

The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

Summoning every bit of his will and remaining strength the lawyer very slowly managed to get to his feet.

Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the duck."


#6933385 - 10/25/17 02:20 PM Re: The Duck [Re: Bass&More]
Cajun Raider Offline

Registered: 07/23/11
Posts: 669
Loc: Texas
The wisdom of old guys always wins out and avoids a lot of pain!
Don't talk the talk if you didn't walk the walk.

#6933472 - 10/25/17 03:14 PM Re: The Duck [Re: Bass&More]
pigplinker Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 08/07/11
Posts: 1653
Loc: Ben Wheeler,Tx

#6933801 - 10/25/17 07:11 PM Re: The Duck [Re: Bass&More]
Michael W. Offline
Veteran Tracker

Registered: 11/22/10
Posts: 3470
Loc: Central Texas / Comal County
Thats an old one, but still a good one.

A clear conscience is often the sign of a fuzzy memory.

#6934727 - 10/26/17 12:56 PM Re: The Duck [Re: Michael W.]
Guy Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 12/06/05
Posts: 27711
Loc: Lake X
No one told it better than Buddy Hackett..

#6935392 - 10/26/17 09:51 PM Re: The Duck [Re: pigplinker]
Deerhunter61 Offline
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 08/27/08
Posts: 7585
Loc: DFW
Originally Posted By: Michael W.
Thats an old one, but still a good one.
Originally Posted By: pigplinker

#6936879 - 10/28/17 11:01 AM Re: The Duck [Re: Bass&More]
colt45 Offline
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 08/19/06
Posts: 7759
Loc: bastrop county
hold on Newt, we got a runaway

#6940567 - 10/31/17 08:48 AM Re: The Duck [Re: Bass&More]
fray Offline

Registered: 09/01/16
Posts: 583
Loc: Commerce, TX


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