Main Menu
Newest Members
Easttexasreloader, Tharper09, triton0917, Wild Phil, Long Ranger
63899 Registered Users
Top Posters
dogcatcher 88519
stxranchman 53159
bill oxner 47864
RKHarm24 44577
rifleman 44388
BOBO the Clown 43767
BMD 40950
Big Orn 37484
SnakeWrangler 37238
txshntr 35255
Forum Stats
63899 Members
45 Forums
419097 Topics
6073795 Posts

Max Online: 16728 @ 03/25/12 08:51 AM
Topic Options
#6919469 - 10/13/17 03:27 PM Heard this one today...
Guy Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 12/06/05
Posts: 28290
Loc: Lake X
A husband went to the sheriff’s department to report that his wife was missing.

Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home.

Sergeant: What is her height?

Husband: Gee, I’m not sure. A little over five-feet tall.

Sergeant: Weight?

Husband: Don’t know. Not slim, not really fat.

Sergeant: Color of eyes?

Husband: Never noticed.

Sergeant: Color of hair?

Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown.

Sergeant: What was she wearing?

Husband: Could have been a skirt or shorts. I don’t remember exactly.

Sergeant: What kind of car did she go in?

Husband: She went in my truck.

Sergeant: What kind of truck was it?

Husband: Brand new 2015 Ford F150 King Ranch 4X4 with eco-boost 5.0L V8 engine special ordered with manual transmission. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed. Custom leather seats and “Bubba” floor mats. Trailering package with gold hitch. DVD with navigation, 21-channel CB radio, six cup holders, and four power outlets. Added special alloy wheels and off-road Michelins. Wife put a small scratch on the drivers door. At this point the husband started choking up.

Sergeant: Don’t worry buddy. We’ll find your truck.

#6919707 - 10/13/17 07:07 PM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
SnakeWrangler Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 01/22/11
Posts: 37238
Loc: Over yonder.....
"You're statistically more likely to be killed by Hillary Clinton than an NRA member. - PolitiDiva

"Death is permanent...everything else is temporary!"

"You Cannot Simultaneously Be Politically Correct And Intellectually Honest!"

#6919714 - 10/13/17 07:14 PM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
HuntingTexas Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 01/06/08
Posts: 17267
Loc: Out of Dallas Co. SOON !!
Sad but true lol444
" In God We Trust "

#6919773 - 10/13/17 08:16 PM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
TexasKC Online   content
Veteran Tracker

Registered: 12/30/12
Posts: 3040
Loc: Houston & Lexington, Texas
A+ up

#6920003 - 10/14/17 05:41 AM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
pigplinker Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 08/07/11
Posts: 1955
Loc: Ben Wheeler,Tx

#6920019 - 10/14/17 06:43 AM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
Simple Searcher Online   content
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 12/30/12
Posts: 6215
Loc: Helotes, Hext

"Man is still a hunter, still a simple searcher after meat..." Robert C. Ruark

#6925510 - 10/19/17 06:03 AM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
Stray Cat Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 05/17/10
Posts: 1309
Loc: Ray Roberts

#6925552 - 10/19/17 07:11 AM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
Bass&More Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 12/02/11
Posts: 1234
Loc: Jack County
clap peep

#6926280 - 10/19/17 05:20 PM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
NMGW Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 01/16/12
Posts: 1584
Loc: New Mexico
New Mexico: Not Really New, Not Really Mexico

#6927504 - 10/20/17 08:16 PM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
Trophytaker3 Offline
Bird Dog

Registered: 10/20/17
Posts: 387
Loc: East Montgomery county, Texas
In this order....
Faith, Family, Hunting.
Pacific Eagle UTV enclosures. Kawasaki, Honda , Polaris, Kymco, and many more!

Trump, Make America Great Again!

#6929977 - 10/23/17 10:50 AM Re: Heard this one today... [Re: Guy]
THF Celebrity

Registered: 11/16/07
Posts: 10812
This would be me. I panic every time I pick something up for her at the pharmacy when they ask for her birth date.
Originally Posted By: bill oxner
Haven't had it in years but never spit any out.


© 2004-2018 OUTDOOR SITES NETWORK all rights reserved USA and Worldwide