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#6738156 - 04/18/17 07:12 AM Brick Layer's accident report
mikei Online   content
Veteran Tracker

Registered: 11/16/14
Posts: 2652
This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board.
This is supposed to be a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.... 
Dear Sir,
I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form I submitted.
  I put 'poor planning' as the cause of my accident.   You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
I am a bricklayer by trade.  On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six-story building.  When I completed my work, I found  that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.  Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor.  Securing the rope at ground I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it.
Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.  You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135 lbs.  Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.  Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building.
In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.  Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.  Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience pain.
At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel.  Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs.  I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.  This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body.
Here my luck began to change slightly.  The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me.  This explains the two broken legs.
I hope this explanation answers your request.
Thank You.

Edited by mikei (04/18/17 07:16 AM)

#6738178 - 04/18/17 07:41 AM Re: Brick Layer's accident report [Re: mikei]
PMK Offline
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 09/10/12
Posts: 6805
Loc: Central TX (Gtown/Austin)
eeks333 definitely poor planning
"everyone that lives dies but not everyone who dies lived..."


#6739902 - 04/19/17 01:48 PM Re: Brick Layer's accident report [Re: mikei]
ducknbass Online   content
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 10/18/06
Posts: 8907
Tears are literally rolling down my face.

#6739945 - 04/19/17 02:31 PM Re: Brick Layer's accident report [Re: mikei]
2Beez Online   happy

Registered: 07/17/15
Posts: 9464
Loc: Lake Texoma, TX

#6740364 - 04/19/17 08:42 PM Re: Brick Layer's accident report [Re: mikei]
SnakeWrangler Online   content
THF Celebrity

Registered: 01/22/11
Posts: 33421
Loc: Over yonder.....
Oldie but a goodie.....have it in hard copy from the 90's......still gives me a chuckle..... rofl
"You're statistically more likely to be killed by Hillary Clinton than an NRA member. - PolitiDiva

"Death is permanent...everything else is temporary!"

"You Cannot Simultaneously Be Politically Correct And Intellectually Honest!"

#6743092 - 04/22/17 03:28 PM Re: Brick Layer's accident report [Re: mikei]
texasag93 Offline

Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 4788
Loc: Argyle

#6743098 - 04/22/17 03:33 PM Re: Brick Layer's accident report [Re: mikei]
txshntr Online   content
T-Rex Arms

Registered: 09/24/10
Posts: 35091
Loc: Mansfield, Texas


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