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#6540445 - 11/12/16 01:24 PM Sobering news from Canada
bill oxner Online   content
THF Celebrity

Registered: 11/03/09
Posts: 32705
Loc: Richmond










The flood of Trump-fearing American liberals sneaking across the
border into Canada has intensified in the past week. The Republican
presidential campaign is prompting an exodus among left-leaning Americans
who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray, pay taxes, obey the law,
and live according to the U.S. Constitution.


Canadian border residents say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology
professors, liberal arts majors, global-warming activists, pampered
athletes, movie stars, and "green" energy proponents crossing their fields
at night.

"I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood
producer huddled in the barn," said southern Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield,
whose
acreage borders North Dakota. "He was cold, exhausted and hungry, and
begged me for a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have
any,
he left before I even got a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"
>
In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher
fences, but the liberals scaled them. He then installed loudspeakers
that blared Rush Limbaugh across the fields, but they just stuck their
fingers in their ears and kept coming. Officials are particularly concerned
about smugglers who meet liberals just south of the border, pack them into
electric cars, and drive them across the border, where they are simply left
to fend for themselves after the battery dies.
>
"A lot of these people are not prepared for our rugged conditions," an
Alberta border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a single
bottle of Perrier water, or any gemelli with shrimp and arugula. All they
had was a nice little Napa Valley cabernet and some kale chips. When
liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing that
they fear persecution from Trump high-hairers.
>
Rumors are circulating about plans being made to build re-education
camps where liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer, study the
Constitution, and find jobs that actually contribute to the economy.
>
In recent days, liberals have turned to ingenious ways of crossing the
border. Some have been disguised as senior citizens taking a bus trip
to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young
vegans in blue-hair wig disguises, Canadian immigration authorities began
stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior citizens about Perry Como
and Rosemary Clooney to prove that they were alive in the '50s.
"If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we
become very suspicious about their age," an official said.
>
Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are
creating an organic-broccoli shortage, are buying up all the Barbara
Streisand CD's, and are overloading the internet while downloading
jazzercise apps to their cell phones.
>
"I really feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy
just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "After all, how many
art-history majors does one country need?
_________________________
Quail hunting is like walking into, and out of a beautiful painting all day long. Gene Hill




Top
#6540452 - 11/12/16 01:28 PM Re: Sobering news from Canada [Re: bill oxner]
Creekrunner Online   happy
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 10/19/12
Posts: 7223
Loc: Bexar/Gillespie, hunt Terrell
banana
_________________________
Get unique, vintage letter press Christmas cards and gift cards from my kid in FW >>>: https://www.etsy.com/shop/abbypress

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#6541165 - 11/13/16 08:05 AM Re: Sobering news from Canada [Re: bill oxner]
decook Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 08/26/09
Posts: 1219
Loc: Montgomery, TX USA
Quote:
"If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we
become very suspicious about their age," an official said.

roflmao
_________________________
Press for an AMERICAN.

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#6541580 - 11/13/16 03:00 PM Re: Sobering news from Canada [Re: bill oxner]
phathawg Offline
Light Foot

Registered: 11/13/12
Posts: 40
Loc: Huntsville, Texas
If only this were true

Top
#6542888 - 11/14/16 10:23 AM Re: Sobering news from Canada [Re: bill oxner]
redfred Offline


Registered: 04/18/09
Posts: 1352
Loc: La Porte
Love it!
_________________________
Alcohol,Tobacco, and Firearms. Should not be a government bureau. Should be a department store.

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#6545140 - 11/15/16 04:46 PM Border Problems
dkershen Online   content


Registered: 05/14/09
Posts: 15184
Loc: Denton/Argyle
News Update from Canada

The flood of Trump-fearing American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week. The Republican presidential win is prompting an exodus among left-leaning Americans who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray, and live according to the Constitution.

Canadian border residents say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, liberal arts majors, global-warming activists, and "green" energy proponents crossing their fields at night.

"I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said southern Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. "He was cold, exhausted and hungry, and begged me for a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left before I even got a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?”

In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. He then installed loudspeakers that blared Rush Limbaugh across the fields, but they just stuck their fingers in their ears and kept coming. Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals just south of the border, pack them into electric cars, and drive them across the border, where they are simply left to fend for themselves after the battery dies.

"A lot of these people are not prepared for our rugged conditions," an Alberta border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a single bottle of Perrier water, or any gemelli with shrimp and arugula. All they had was a nice little Napa Valley Cabernet and some kale chips. When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing about Rumors are circulating about plans being made to build re-education camps where liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer, study the Constitution, and find jobs that actually contribute to the economy.

In recent days, liberals have turned to ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have been disguised as senior citizens taking a bus trip to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans in blue-hair wig disguises, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior citizens about Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney to prove that they were alive in the ‘50s.

"If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we become very suspicious about their age," an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage, are buying up all the Barbara Streisand CD's, and are overloading the internet while downloading apps to their cell phones.

"I really feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "After all, how many art-history majors does one country need?
_________________________

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
www.NewHopeEquine.com

Top
#6545145 - 11/15/16 04:51 PM Re: Border Problems [Re: dkershen]
Thundervee Offline


Registered: 06/14/09
Posts: 8445
Loc: Shepherd
clap
_________________________

Top
#6545148 - 11/15/16 04:53 PM Re: Border Problems [Re: dkershen]
Western Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 04/20/11
Posts: 23592
Loc: Wise County Texas
rofl
_________________________
Friends don't let Friends drink and post.......

The first 5 day's after the weekend, are the hardest....

Dennis


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#6545174 - 11/15/16 05:15 PM Re: Border Problems [Re: dkershen]
mrmo Online   content
THF Celebrity

Registered: 11/20/09
Posts: 21041
Loc: 31*32'57"N 97*8'47"W
grin
_________________________
NORML











Top
#6545203 - 11/15/16 05:26 PM Re: Border Problems [Re: dkershen]
TXSIGNGUY Online   content
Tracker

Registered: 09/08/15
Posts: 581
Loc: College Station
roflmao rofl

Top
#6545234 - 11/15/16 05:41 PM Re: Border Problems [Re: dkershen]
SniperRAB Online   content
GRAMPS!!!

Registered: 03/26/12
Posts: 21182
Loc: Nurturing Biosphere Mothership
"I really feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them,"


Come on just take a few roflmao



Compiled by The County Information Program, Texas Association of Counties
POPULATION (Census Bureau)
County Population «History» «Group Quarters»
Per Capita Income - 2014 (BEA): $35,276 More data
Median Household Income - 2014 (Census Bureau): $43,091 More data
Navarro County Profile - County Data
_________________________

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#6545261 - 11/15/16 05:57 PM Re: Border Problems [Re: dkershen]
bill oxner Online   content
THF Celebrity

Registered: 11/03/09
Posts: 32705
Loc: Richmond
_________________________
Quail hunting is like walking into, and out of a beautiful painting all day long. Gene Hill




Top
#6559057 - 11/26/16 06:06 AM Re: Border Problems [Re: bill oxner]
Deadend Online   content
Pro Tracker

Registered: 09/07/09
Posts: 1956
Loc: Mineola,TX
clap roflmao
_________________________
903-312-0609
www.guideonlakefork.com
www.lakeforkduckhunting.com

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