Main Menu
Advertisement
Affiliates
Advertisement
Newest Members
TexasYeti, Nicole Martin, Herschelb, Aggie70, Walters
63513 Registered Users
Top Posters
dogcatcher 86427
stxranchman 52425
bill oxner 45525
RWH24 44568
rifleman 44349
BOBO the Clown 43392
BMD 40822
Big Orn 37484
txshntr 35138
SnakeWrangler 34044
facebook
Forum Stats
63513 Members
45 Forums
449165 Topics
6205975 Posts

Max Online: 16728 @ 03/25/12 08:51 AM
Topic Options
#6315985 - 05/30/16 07:48 AM Mom's birthday joke
Cast Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 12/14/08
Posts: 17586
Loc: North Texas - God's Country
Big sis and little bro fancy themselves as masters of ceremony yesterday, decided we should all thank mom for something she passed on to us. Just a simple honoring, ok. Couple of them went before me and the process stalled. They looked at big bro.

Most folks in the room know me. The LEO's and I are buddies. I stand up, they kinda groan, I walk to front, greet mom and them, and tell how she made me the second best cook in the entire world. I could go on but I could also tell a dirty joke. You know what they wanted. I started to but offered to tell mom and she could tell them. That worked out. I told mom.

A little old lady (see, topical) walks into a bar and sits on a barstool.

'I'll have a cold draft while I wait on Mildred, please. '

She sits and sips on her beer. After a bit, she starts to lean to the right. Bartender notices and gently steers her back upright.

She sips her beer and in a bit, starts to lean left a little. Bartender again notices and lovingly corrects her to upright.

She sips her beer and the door opens revealing her friend Mildred has arrived. She sits down beside the little old lady and orders a cold draft.

'We've never met here before,' Mildred said, 'How is it?' While looking around the establishment.

After a pause, the little old lady says, 'Well, it's not bad. The draft is good and cold.' And the little old lady leaned over to Mildred and whispered in her ear, 'but they won't let you poot!'

Mom cracked up. That joke will make the rounds.
_________________________
Cast



I have a short attention spa

Top
#6316022 - 05/30/16 08:30 AM Re: Mom's birthday joke [Re: Cast]
bill oxner Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 11/03/09
Posts: 45525
Loc: Katy-Fulshear
Check your in box. I'll send you a better one.
_________________________
Quail hunting is like walking into, and out of a beautiful painting all day long. Gene Hill









Top
#6316053 - 05/30/16 09:11 AM Re: Mom's birthday joke [Re: Cast]
Superduty Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 10/27/04
Posts: 12378
Loc: Arlington, Texas
Good one Cast!

rofl
_________________________

Top
#6316056 - 05/30/16 09:14 AM Re: Mom's birthday joke [Re: Superduty]
SnakeWrangler Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 01/22/11
Posts: 34044
Loc: Over yonder.....
Originally Posted By: Superduty
Good one Cast!

rofl
clap
_________________________
"You're statistically more likely to be killed by Hillary Clinton than an NRA member. - PolitiDiva

"Death is permanent...everything else is temporary!"

"You Cannot Simultaneously Be Politically Correct And Intellectually Honest!"

Top
#6317730 - 05/31/16 05:34 PM Re: Mom's birthday joke [Re: Cast]
RedHoss Offline
Veteran Tracker

Registered: 09/27/10
Posts: 2821
Loc: Houston, Texas
Good one!...LOL!... cheers

Top
#6319220 - 06/01/16 08:56 PM Re: Mom's birthday joke [Re: Cast]
300j Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 12/07/11
Posts: 1223
Loc: D/FW
clap
_________________________
All ready

Top
#6320967 - 06/02/16 11:51 PM Re: Mom's birthday joke [Re: Cast]
Deadend Offline
Veteran Tracker

Registered: 09/07/09
Posts: 2520
Loc: Mineola,TX
clap
_________________________
Deadend Outfitters
903-312-0609 Lance Vick
Fun begins where the road ends,,,
Year around guided hog hunts
www.deadendoutfitters.com
https://m.facebook.com/deadendhoghunts/
www.guideonlakefork.com
www.lakeforkduckhunting.com

Top



© 2004-2018 OUTDOOR SITES NETWORK all rights reserved USA and Worldwide