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#6243927 - 04/01/16 07:39 AM The Law of Rules
mikei Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 11/16/14
Posts: 1055
. Law of Mechanical Repair -

After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

2. Law of Gravity

- Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped,will roll to the least accessible place in the universe.

3. Law of Probability

- The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4. Law of Random Numbers

- If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers.

5. Variation Law

- If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.

6. Law of the Bath

- When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.

7. Law of Close

Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

8. Law of the Result

- When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!

9. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

10 . Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.

11. The Coffee Law

- As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

12. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

13. Law of Physical Surfaces -

The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

14. Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about.

15. Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

16. Law of Public Speaking - A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO FEET!

17. Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it! (like Rye-Krisp)

18. Doctors' Law

- If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.

#6244017 - 04/01/16 08:33 AM Re: The Law of Rules [Re: mikei]
Cast Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 12/14/08
Posts: 14901
Loc: North Texas - God's Country
If I like it and it works well, it is obsolete.

I have a short attention spa

#6244118 - 04/01/16 09:35 AM Re: The Law of Rules [Re: mikei]
PMK Offline
Extreme Tracker

Registered: 09/10/12
Posts: 4783
Loc: Central TX (Gtown/Austin)
Murphy's Law of HEB / Walmart - if there are only 2 people in the entire store, you will see them on every aisle and they will be in your way and moving overly slow.
"everyone that lives dies but not everyone who dies lived..."


#6249794 - 04/06/16 09:48 AM Re: The Law of Rules [Re: mikei]
Kory Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 07/13/10
Posts: 1398
Loc: Sherman
Law of deer hunting: If your target buck is on camera every morning and evening for 3 weeks, the second you sit in your stand, he will be inside your camp eating chips you dropped the night before.

#6258554 - 04/13/16 03:17 PM Re: The Law of Rules [Re: Cast]
chital_shikari Online   content
Minor in training

Registered: 08/03/11
Posts: 11233
Loc: Katy, TX
Originally Posted By: Cast
If I like it and it works well, it is obsolete.

#6258863 - 04/13/16 06:22 PM Re: The Law of Rules [Re: mikei]
blackcoal Offline
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 01/19/12
Posts: 7517
Loc: 60 Mi North of DFW
1. should read Mechanical Repair or Proximity to Poison Ivy.
The Greatest Enemy of knowledge is not ignorance,
it is the illusion of knowledge.--Stephen Hawking


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