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The lawyer vs the farmer
#5939410
09/21/15 08:29 PM
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 22,630
Cast
OP
THF Celebrity
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OP
THF Celebrity
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 22,630 |
It's probably a repost, but worth another go...
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural northern Minnesota. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field.
As the lawyer climbed over the fence to claim his bird, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.
The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."
The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."
The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in New England and, if you don't let me retrieve that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."
The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes here in northern Minnesota. We settle small disagreements like this with the 'Three Kick Rule.'"
The lawyer asked, "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?"
The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."
The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and, being the person he was, decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.
The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees! His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.
The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and remaining strength and very slowly managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."
The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the duck."
Cast I have a short attention spa
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Re: The lawyer vs the farmer
[Re: Cast]
#5939414
09/21/15 08:33 PM
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 39,549
redchevy
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 39,549 |
If only life worked that way... the attorneys probably feel differently though
It's hell eatin em live
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Re: The lawyer vs the farmer
[Re: Cast]
#5939470
09/21/15 09:21 PM
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Joined: May 2015
Posts: 210
powerstroke96
Woodsman
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Woodsman
Joined: May 2015
Posts: 210 |
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
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Re: The lawyer vs the farmer
[Re: Cast]
#5939735
09/21/15 11:59 PM
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Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 3,504
txmudder
Extreme Tracker
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Extreme Tracker
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 3,504 |
That's funny. Gonna have to remember this one.
You should have been here yesterday!
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Re: The lawyer vs the farmer
[Re: Cast]
#5939999
09/22/15 02:07 AM
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Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,467
bassfishinglawyer
Veteran Tracker
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Veteran Tracker
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 2,467 |
I feel like I get kicked like that most weeks!
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Re: The lawyer vs the farmer
[Re: Cast]
#5940970
09/22/15 05:33 PM
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Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 1,426
DuckCoach1985
Pro Tracker
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Pro Tracker
Joined: Oct 2013
Posts: 1,426 |
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Re: The lawyer vs the farmer
[Re: Cast]
#5941040
09/22/15 06:19 PM
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,734
NMGW
Pro Tracker
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Pro Tracker
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,734 |
New Mexico: Not Really New, Not Really Mexico
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Re: The lawyer vs the farmer
[Re: Cast]
#5941119
09/22/15 06:57 PM
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Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 4,579
Son of a Blitch
Extreme Tracker
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Extreme Tracker
Joined: Oct 2012
Posts: 4,579 |
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Re: The lawyer vs the farmer
[Re: Cast]
#5949693
09/28/15 02:09 AM
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Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 292
coach20
Bird Dog
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Bird Dog
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 292 |
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