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#5798389 - 06/20/15 09:59 PM Lonely Ethel
sleepyhunter Offline
Bird Dog

Registered: 09/04/13
Posts: 377
Loc: Burleson TX


Ethel was traveling alone and she was a bit lonely in the hotel all on her own. She thought, "I'll call one of those men you see advertised in phone books for escorts and sex and have some fun.”
She looked through the phone book, found a full page ad for a guy calling himself Tender Tony - a very handsome man with assorted physical skills flexing in the photo. He had all the right muscles in all the right places, thick wavy hair, long powerful legs, dazzling smile, six pack abs and she felt quite certain she could bounce a sixpence off his well-oiled bum. She figured, “what the heck, nobody will ever know. I'll give him a call."

After a short ring, there was a response, “Good evening, ma'am, how may I help you?” Oh my, he sounded sooo sexy!

Afraid she would lose her nerve if she hesitated, she rushed right in, "Hi, I hear you give a great massage. I'd like you to come to my hotel room and give me one. No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hot, and I want it now. Bring implements, toys, rubber, leather, whips, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. We'll go hot and heavy all night - tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything and everything!!! Now how does that sound?"

The male voice responded, "That sounds absolutely fantastic madam, but you need to press 9 for an outside line."
_________________________




Broke from buying guns, bows and fishing tackle and wouldn't have it any other way.

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#5798401 - 06/20/15 10:12 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
HuntingTexas Online   content
THF Celebrity

Registered: 01/06/08
Posts: 17201
Loc: Out of Dallas Co. SOON !!
rofl
_________________________
" In God We Trust "




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#5798727 - 06/21/15 09:03 AM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
Simple Searcher Offline
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 12/30/12
Posts: 5891
Loc: Helotes, Hext
clap
OOPS
_________________________


"Man is still a hunter, still a simple searcher after meat..." Robert C. Ruark

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#5799425 - 06/21/15 07:08 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
TonyinVA Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 03/24/14
Posts: 1983
Loc: Virginia, USA
lol

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#5799608 - 06/21/15 09:17 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
Deadend Online   content
Veteran Tracker

Registered: 09/07/09
Posts: 2529
Loc: Mineola,TX
roflmao
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Deadend Outfitters
903-312-0609 Lance Vick
Fun begins where the road ends,,,
Year around guided hog hunts
www.deadendoutfitters.com
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www.guideonlakefork.com
www.lakeforkduckhunting.com

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#5799932 - 06/22/15 07:18 AM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
stxranchman Offline
Obie Juan Kenobi

Registered: 08/04/10
Posts: 52536
roflmao
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#5800551 - 06/22/15 03:44 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
PMK Offline
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 09/10/12
Posts: 7148
Loc: Central TX (Gtown/Austin)
geekfreak bang
_________________________
"everyone that lives dies but not everyone who dies lived..."

~PMK~

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#5801493 - 06/23/15 06:38 AM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
TXHOGSLAYER Offline
goatboy

Registered: 01/12/12
Posts: 14839
Loc: Katy, TX
roflmao
_________________________

Originally Posted By: bill oxner
Also, I wonder why you guys are arguing if you have not tried it both ways.

Originally Posted By: bill oxner
I got 3 inches.

Originally Posted By: nsmike
you haven't seen anything, until two gays go at it.

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#5801849 - 06/23/15 10:27 AM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
texasag93 Online   content


Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 4940
Loc: Argyle
whip

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#5802090 - 06/23/15 01:31 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
Gravytrain Online   content
THF Celebrity

Registered: 01/06/11
Posts: 26220
Loc: Rowlett, Tx
This would be a lot funnier if my mom's name weren't Ethel

blush

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#5802831 - 06/23/15 08:52 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
JRJ6 Offline
Extreme Tracker

Registered: 03/13/14
Posts: 4003
Loc: Dallas, TX
up

Funny

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#5814135 - 07/01/15 08:56 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
bigdavehunting Offline


Registered: 01/30/09
Posts: 1481
Loc: Abilene Tx
woot
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