Main Menu
Advertisement
Affiliates
Advertisement
Newest Members
HiddenHunter, Calleen, David L, ETXTrophyHunter, nmccardle19
60841 Registered Users
Top Posters
dogcatcher 78644
stxranchman 52092
RWH24 44568
rifleman 43887
BOBO the Clown 41230
BMD 40575
Big Orn 37484
txshntr 34012
bill oxner 33650
sig226fan (Rguns.com) 30809
facebook
Forum Stats
60841 Members
45 Forums
412879 Topics
5751266 Posts

Max Online: 16728 @ 03/25/12 08:51 AM
Topic Options
#5798389 - 06/20/15 09:59 PM Lonely Ethel
sleepyhunter Offline
Bird Dog

Registered: 09/04/13
Posts: 313
Loc: Burleson TX


Ethel was traveling alone and she was a bit lonely in the hotel all on her own. She thought, "I'll call one of those men you see advertised in phone books for escorts and sex and have some fun.”
She looked through the phone book, found a full page ad for a guy calling himself Tender Tony - a very handsome man with assorted physical skills flexing in the photo. He had all the right muscles in all the right places, thick wavy hair, long powerful legs, dazzling smile, six pack abs and she felt quite certain she could bounce a sixpence off his well-oiled bum. She figured, “what the heck, nobody will ever know. I'll give him a call."

After a short ring, there was a response, “Good evening, ma'am, how may I help you?” Oh my, he sounded sooo sexy!

Afraid she would lose her nerve if she hesitated, she rushed right in, "Hi, I hear you give a great massage. I'd like you to come to my hotel room and give me one. No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hot, and I want it now. Bring implements, toys, rubber, leather, whips, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. We'll go hot and heavy all night - tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything and everything!!! Now how does that sound?"

The male voice responded, "That sounds absolutely fantastic madam, but you need to press 9 for an outside line."
_________________________




Broke from buying guns, bows and fishing tackle and wouldn't have it any other way.

Top
#5798401 - 06/20/15 10:12 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
HuntingTexas Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 01/06/08
Posts: 16656
Loc: Duncanville, Tx.
rofl
_________________________
" In God We Trust "




Top
#5798727 - 06/21/15 09:03 AM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
Simple Searcher Offline
Extreme Tracker

Registered: 12/30/12
Posts: 4247
Loc: Helotes, Hext
clap
OOPS
_________________________

"Man is still a hunter, still a simple searcher after meat..." Robert C. Ruark

Top
#5799425 - 06/21/15 07:08 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
TonyinVA Offline
Pro Tracker

Registered: 03/24/14
Posts: 1896
Loc: Virginia, USA
lol

Top
#5799608 - 06/21/15 09:17 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
Deadend Online   content
Veteran Tracker

Registered: 09/07/09
Posts: 2004
Loc: Mineola,TX
roflmao
_________________________
Deadend Outfitters
903-312-0609 Lance Vick
Year around guided hog hunts
https://m.facebook.com/deadendhoghunts/
www.guideonlakefork.com
www.lakeforkduckhunting.com

Top
#5799932 - 06/22/15 07:18 AM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
stxranchman Offline
Obie Juan Kenobi

Registered: 08/04/10
Posts: 52092
roflmao
_________________________


Top
#5800551 - 06/22/15 03:44 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
PMK Online   content
THF Trophy Hunter

Registered: 09/10/12
Posts: 5086
Loc: Central TX (Gtown/Austin)
geekfreak bang
_________________________
"everyone that lives dies but not everyone who dies lived..."

~PMK~

Top
#5801493 - 06/23/15 06:38 AM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
TXHOGSLAYER Offline
THF Celebrity

Registered: 01/12/12
Posts: 12342
Loc: Katy, TX
roflmao
_________________________
Originally Posted By: clu
Always great when there is a happy ending!

Top
#5801849 - 06/23/15 10:27 AM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
texasag93 Online   content


Registered: 04/12/09
Posts: 4168
Loc: Argyle
whip

Top
#5802090 - 06/23/15 01:31 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
Gravytrain Online   content
THF Celebrity

Registered: 01/06/11
Posts: 17509
Loc: Rowlett, Tx
This would be a lot funnier if my mom's name weren't Ethel

blush

Top
#5802831 - 06/23/15 08:52 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
JRJ6 Offline
Extreme Tracker

Registered: 03/13/14
Posts: 3923
Loc: Dallas, TX
up

Funny

Top
#5814135 - 07/01/15 08:56 PM Re: Lonely Ethel [Re: sleepyhunter]
bigdavehunting Offline


Registered: 01/30/09
Posts: 1392
Loc: Abilene Tx
woot
_________________________

Top



© 2004-2016 OUTDOOR SITES NETWORK all rights reserved USA and Worldwide